How to Spot and Avoid an Online Dating Scammer: 8 Red Flags

Megan Ellis Updated 05-12-2019

Online dating scams continue to rise, costing unsuspecting victims millions of dollars each year. Rather than simply sending phishing emails, cybercriminals are playing the long game to cheat people out of their money.


If you are using an online dating platform, make sure to look out for these signs that the person you’re talking to is actually a scammer—and how to avoid online dating scams in general.

Who Do Dating Site Scams Target?

Scammers target people across different demographics on every dating platform possible. This means that regardless of gender, sexual orientation, age, or preferred platform; no one is off-bounds to a scammer.

However, they tend to target older people more often. Meanwhile, the biggest targets for long-term catfishing scams are people who are vulnerable or isolated.

Plenty of Fish (POF) scams are particularly prevalent due to the large nature of the network. However, scams exist on sites like Ashley Madison,, and the majority of other dating sites.

With the rise of dating apps, scammers cast an even wider net for potential targets and automate much of the process—using bots to lure victims into scams.


Ways to Spot an Online Dating Scammer

1. Profile Warning Signs

There are a few signs you should look out for when looking at a potential match’s online dating profile.

A few typical traits of a scammer’s profile include:

  • Profiles have very few images or images that seem to be model or glamour stock photos
  • Despite looking for singles in your area, they work or live in another country
  • Many scammers claim to be on military deployment in another country

On dating apps, scammers and bots will have very limited profile information. They also tend to only have one or two photos and do not link their profile to their Instagram or other accounts.

2. They Try to Take the Conversation Elsewhere

Online dating scammers, especially those catfishing victims, will quickly ask you to move to another form of messaging outside the platform where you met.


Often, scammers will want to communicate via written messages on Skype or Facebook. However, they may also choose to message you over SMS or an app like Whatsapp.

Be wary of anyone you haven’t met that wants to move the conversation to another platform.

3. Your Match Professes Love Early On

Online dating scammers tend to move very quickly in terms of professing an emotional connection. Within a short period, they may say they love you and that they feel a very deep connection to you.

This is all part of the emotional manipulation involved in catfishing while using online dating. It’s also why people who are vulnerable and isolated are such desirable targets—since they’re yearning for a connection.


You should look out for any matches that are overly flattering and overly devoted early on in your communication when you haven’t even met.

4. They Want To Meet You, But Something Always Comes Up

A common line among online dating scammers is that they want to meet you, but when the time comes, there is always some unexpected issue.

Since the scammer is not the person they claim to be, they don’t want to meet in person. This is also the reason why so many scammers claim to work in another country or be on military deployment since it provides them with an excuse for not being able to meet up. In fact, many scammers use photos of military personnel and soldiers on their profiles.

The inability to meet you may even be the supposed reason they first try to solicit money from a victim. They may claim to need money to buy a ticket to travel to meet you. Sometimes, they’ll say that border officials detained them and that they need money for their release.


5. They Avoid Video Chat Completely

According to the Better Business Bureau, the majority of romance scams trace back to people living in Nigeria. So, if a scammer is a foreigner from a country like Nigeria, Ghana, or Malaysia, they may avoid phonecalls or voice chat on programs like Skype, since their accent may give them away.

However, scammers are able to fake accents for victims that back up their claimed country of origin.

No matter what, a catfish will not appear in video chat since they use fake profile images. Be wary if your match is never willing to appear in video chat or always makes excuses about their camera being broken.

Most smartphones now have built-in selfie cameras, which makes video chatting relatively easy. Some people may initially hesitate to appear on video chat out of shyness. But it’s a red flag if someone professes love, yet won’t let you talk to them over video after weeks of communication.

6. They Request Money From You

Inevitably, a catfish will request money from you, as this is the ultimate goal of most scammers. There are a variety of scenarios that they may invent—from family emergencies, health issues, or travel problems.

Particularly inventive scammers may even trick you into sending them money by purportedly sending you a package that requires customs fees. Scammers don’t necessarily work alone, so you may receive a phone call or documents from someone posing as third-party to request fees.

Some scammers even request financial help or financial investment related to their fictional business.

If any kind of financial request comes from your suitor, or from something related to them (such as a package or business), this is the biggest sign that you are the target of a scam.

7. They Ask for Your Help With Financial Transactions

One of the newer online dating scams doesn’t request money from victims, but turns them into “money mules”. Rather than trying to get money from the victim, these scammers make you an accomplice in money laundering.

One example includes the scammer sending money to the victim, who then sends them an Amazon card or another kind of gift card. Other times they might send you money and ask you to send it to another account for them.

Sometimes, scammers may ask a victim to open a bank account for them.

If your online suitor asks you to get involved in these types of financial transactions and exchanges, it’s likely that they’re a scammer trying to lure you into illegal activities.

8. They Send You a Link to Another Service or Website

Some scammers don’t bother with catfishing, rather using more efficient ways to exploit victims. This is especially true on online dating apps, where bot profiles are prevalent.

If a match sends you a link to an app, game, service, or website they say they want you to try out; this is often a ploy to get you to supply financial information or download malware.

It is essentially the online dating version of phishing and is a very popular tactic for scammers on dating apps like Tinder The 5 Worst Tinder Scams: Tips for Dating Safely on Tinder Here are Tinder scams, like the verify account scam, that you should look out for, along with advice on how to avoid them. Read More .

How to Avoid Online Dating Scams

Besides spotting a potential scammer, there are a few precautions you can take to avoid online dating scams.

Firstly, use reverse image searches and tools like to verify a person’s online identity. You should check that the same image isn’t appearing across a variety of profiles under different names.

You should also keep up-to-date on the different types of dating scams emerging, especially those related to the platform you’re using. Not all dating scams involve prolonged catfishing, and certain mobile dating app scams differ from dating website scams.

Finally, never reveal too much information about yourself to someone you’ve never met. A catfish will use your financial situation and whether you’re vulnerable to determine whether you’re an ideal target.

If you receive overly flattering introduction emails or messages on an online dating site, simply don’t respond. On mobile dating apps, don’t match with profiles that seem suspicious.

Furthermore, never send intimate images of yourself to an online acquaintance—scammers are now using these types of pictures for blackmail and extortion schemes.

Finally, if warning signs pop up and you are unable to verify the person’s identity, cut off communication immediately.

Protect Yourself While Dating Online

One of the most important measures to date when dating online is to protect your privacy. This not only helps you avoid scams, but can also protect you from creeps and cyberstalkers.

From making sure you don’t share too much, to blocking linking between social media apps, check out our guide on protecting your privacy while using online dating How to Protect Your Privacy While Online Dating Online dating can leave you vulnerable to privacy risks. In this article, we explain how to stay anonymous and protect your privacy on popular dating apps. Read More .

Related topics: Online Dating, Online Fraud, Scams, Tinder.

Affiliate Disclosure: By buying the products we recommend, you help keep the site alive. Read more.

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  1. Leo girl
    July 11, 2020 at 10:38 pm

    Few months I have chatting with man from online dating apps name Galactic love after a days we've meet that site he told me to go in another site name hangout so we're chatting there, his name and profile is the prince of one country, after how many days he asked me if I can love him not because his a prince, I said yes of course, he told me he want to marry me and meet me but first I need to register and get a royal ID member so after I register he will send me a ticket going to his country and send me a money too, I send before he said it's for the Royal ID member but the name of the person who was I send is Nigerian name but in his country he said that person works in the palace,, then he told me to register quickly so we can meet,, I asked him a video call but he said it's not allowed to talk to him if not a royal member couse in the role of the palace,, and his always to hurry up me to register but I'm not a rich Im just working as a house maid. I don't know if he is real or not..

  2. Julia
    November 20, 2019 at 12:09 pm

    I have a chat mate a foreigner , a petroleum engineer , he said he has box contains cash money and gold bars and the safety vault company have to do some renovation and have to pull out his box within 72 hrs and also his insurance has already expired. He has to save the box by sending it to me thru a shipping company. The website is ace line security and shipping ltd and alliant Golden security and shipping ltd based in Malaysia. Hr said he has no access for his money to pay the parcel shipping cost because his work now is offshore assigned in Venezuela as driller of oil exploration in a big company. Then he said to me to email those company for computation. The shipping company told me to pay a total of 1,950 USD for documentation, shipping cost, insurance to pay transfer thru bank. The shipping company send me those details of bank account, name of holder, name of bank and swift code. I smell something fishy and did not believed them. I blocked my chat mate and reported to interpol

  3. Major
    November 17, 2019 at 4:11 pm

    I'mA 72-year-old man divorced for the past six years and living alone, I have been scammed out of several thousand dollars over the past years trusting the individual is not a scammer. I have also spent hundreds of dollars on numerous dating sites and have yet to find one woman in all this time. Most of the dating sites indicate that you may join for free only to find they present you with numerous attractive women's profile sent photos however prohibit you from messaging them or reading their message to you unless you join as a member so there is no free lunch on any of the sites I have used
    I also was under the impression women are able to join sites free in order to attract men who would be willing to pay or there are women who require a great deal of your personal information which is then sold on the black market and she is compensated.
    My experience with all dating sites and there have been numerous has been negative in every case..

  4. Anonymous
    October 10, 2019 at 5:29 pm

    I had an "LDR" with a very handsome, charismatic and charming Turkish man, who I met on vacation in Spain in September 2018. It went on for about 8 months. I am another man, and this guy said he was a closeted Gay man.
    We had a relationship, where we talked almost every night by Facetime and texted. He had more sob stories in 8 months but never came out and asked me for money.
    We both were talking future. I developed very strong feelings for him.
    I visited in person, twice in Turkey, once in Chicago and a final "ending" in Malta. He said I was "cheap with my money." I asked him to see his passport ( I wanted to see the countries he had been to) but he got spooked and thought I was on to something.
    He "ended" it the next day by text and I have not heard from him since.
    He also asked me to commit to him at Ataturk Airport, after my first visit to Turkey. I said I was not ready.
    This guy played me the entire time. He was brilliant. But he also had a BS factor that was through the roof. I think I knew the entire time, in the back of my head.

  5. Anonymous
    October 10, 2019 at 5:18 pm

    I had "LDR" with a very handsome, charismatic and charming Turkish man for about 9 months. I met him in Spain on vacation. I actually met up with him, twice in Turkey, Chicago and once again in Malta, where it "ended." I believe it was a scam the entire time. We were both talking future. He asked me to commit about Ataturk Airport after my first visit to Turkey. I said I wasn't ready.
    He never asked me for money but always had a sob story. It took me awhile to catch on because we talked for about 6 months, every night and I visited him at his "home" in Turkey.
    He ended things in Malta, after he said " I was cheap with my money" and I asked to see his passport. I wanted to see the countries he had been to but he thought I was on to something. He got spooked and I have not heard from him since.
    Not sure how this guy sleeps at night and I am sure he has others on his wheel.
    Pretty sure he leads another life in Turkey, probably married.

    The weird thing is I think I knew from the beginning, in the back of my head, that someone was off.

  6. charles
    September 20, 2019 at 3:08 pm
  7. Anonymous
    September 18, 2019 at 1:17 am

    I knew a guy from Ig. He claims that he is a drilling engineer and now is on contract at an oil rig. When we had a conversation, I realised there were so many discrepancies in which he later omit to answer when i asked for confirmation. I found out he was lying when all in his pictures, he used iphone 6 to take pictures. But when i asked him is he using iphone, he said no. Another lie was when he himself got confused with the time zone he told me. Sometimes the time difference was 5 hours. Suddenly it became 6 hours and later it became 7 hours. Hahaha... I caught him. I also questioned his nationality because his passport is different with the pictures he gave to me before. Recently I asked him directly and if he is a scammer and if he is expecting money from me, it ain't gonna happens. he said he is upset because I didn't trust him.. yada yada yada.. and he suddenly quite until now. Hahahaha.

  8. Anonymous
    September 18, 2019 at 1:02 am

    From my observation, those scammers are nigerians. Even if they say they are from Malaysia, he is actually Nigerian who had overstayed in Malaysia. Too many Nigerians male and female overstayed in Malaysia. The Malaysian called them Awang Hitam. They are good in escaping when the Immigration made rush. Too bad for the country.

  9. Dawn
    August 28, 2019 at 1:07 pm

    Same story all the time. They are always in the military, usually an engineer with a supposed kid. Major warning signs. Always claim to be widowed.

  10. Christine Urry
    March 13, 2019 at 6:50 am

    99.9% of men on line are scammers. I have had many who have talked for some time. Most are easily spotted , its the ones who talk for ages who are dangerous and cleaver i keep photos to remember most . Talking about friends and family not money for months. And then a sudden change? Grammar is another give away! I block report now quite early .i found when i put photographs on show i had more requests for friendship also..aprox 7+ per day ! But the best advice i would give someone is never ever give money .itune cards. Or agree to accept parcels! No service men! They are as i found out all scammers.

    • dragonmouth
      March 26, 2019 at 5:35 pm

      Look up the definition of MISANDRY. Your post is a perfect example of it.

  11. Brian Walker
    January 29, 2019 at 6:00 pm

    I Was almost scammed but luckily caught on. I became suspicious and luckily, got online to get information about Date Site scammers. Mine was the classic case and this person followed the profile to the T! I'm 70 years old, the lady that responded said she was 53. She started out slowly but as our conversations continued over the next couple weeks, she became more romantically aggressive. She was the one that offered to meet. I agreed, and on the appointed day drove about 30 miles to meet her at a Restaurant. I had no sooner parked, was about fifteen minutes early, I received a text from her saying she had gotten tied up at a meeting and could not make it! Ok, I contacted her the next day to set up another meeting but she informed me that she was packing and had to leave on a "business" trip to Maylasia. We continued to text each other once she had supposedly gotten to her destination. Then she texted me that she was in trouble, the hotel she was staying at had taken her passport because her bank had stopped honoring her card and she couldn't pay her motel bill. She needed $1400. and would I lend it to her till she got back to the States. I asked her a few questions on why the bank stopped honoring her card but she responded that it was because of her being out of Country. She had already been there for 5 days! I kept asking and I could tell she was becoming more agitated that I wouldn't just agree to send her the money. She became real defensive saying that I didn't trust her and that how could we have a relationship if I wouldn't help her when she needed it. Finally I just told her NO! Haven't heard from her since!

  12. Sebastian Rivera-Figueroa
    December 27, 2018 at 11:04 pm

    I live in Chile, South America. I was scammed in May this year, first on Facebook, later on Hangouts. There was someone using name and public image of British celebrity Elizabeth Hurley. The scammer said that needed money for a charity work in Nigeria.
    At first I thought it was a good idea to help the cause, but later on this person became annoying, and asking for larger sums of money.
    But the joke is far from ending. Some days later, this person promised that it would redeem my money back, a thing that isn't happening yet. There was another person serving as a complice for the scammer, and then she told me to make additional payments to a person in Nigeria (again).
    I stopped throwing my savings away with these idiots, they took my money (around USD 1500) and my patience. So, people, be careful of social media. Nigerian fraudsters use that intensively to get money from innocent and fragile people. Call to local police, or even to INTERPOL, for better help.

  13. Lynn Gonder
    November 30, 2018 at 4:06 am

    The one scammer that I met, was sending me pictures of him and in one picture you could clearly see that he had a wedding band on. His wife was supposed to be a widow he had a child he was in the military overseas, the usual! then he told me that he wanted to send me money so he needed my bank information which was a huge red flag for me. And I just continue talking to him. But I talked to him for quite a while and he said everything that I wanted to hear, you're beautiful now when I meet a guy and he says he's in the military and he's first telling me that he lives somewhere close to me and then he wants to chat on a different site and he seems like a nice enough guy so I agree to talk to him on say Hangouts and then he ends up telling me about the military, that's not good. This just happened right now and it refresh my memory of why I'm not supposed to really talk to people outside of the POF app. I did some research and these are all very common behaviors especially the being in some branch of the service.

  14. Todd Griffin
    October 24, 2018 at 4:22 pm

    I have a feeling that I am getting scammed now. The first time I started talking to this woman, she asked me for an iPhone 10xs max. I said I would send her one, but not going to, then she started asking for money to be sent to her. She is supposedly a graduate student in Michigan. English is not her first language. I went on Google Earth and entered the address she gave me and came up with an apartment building. I didn't get an apartment number, so I asked for one, instead of getting the apartment number, I was told just send it to the address and I will get it, that sent up the biggest flag for me. Anyone I meet and start dating, I don't ask for money and would never think of asking someone for a phone. All the pictures she sent have been taken by someone else, not one selfie. Beware, if it sounds too good to be true, then it is.

  15. Heidi
    September 6, 2018 at 4:24 pm

    Was on a site a few month ago but deleted my profile since and was communicating with a gentleman. "Michael" sent me a text 2wks ago and the tip-off was when he had asked me "what time is it in Connecticut" when he claimed to live in Syracuse, NY. Claimed one night @ 10:00pm that he had an 11:30pm flight to Finland and was in the process of eating Thai food takeout and had to shower and still catch this flight. His fish line came rolling in when he texted me and asked me to go to a Walmart and buy a $100.00 money card (which Idk what he meant by that) take a photo of it and then send it to him. Please be aware that "Michael" is a scam and do not reply to phone#480-757-1958

  16. Martin Russel
    September 4, 2018 at 3:44 am

    Hello, so i just want to put it out there that the Money Back Recovery Firm are a tried and tested assets and fund recovery firm. I came across them when my company almost lost millions in dollar investments to fake brokers. Money back recovery firm also provided services involving forex and crypto trading, investment management for my company.

    to recover lost money and crytopcurrencies contact them at moneybackrecovery on gmail.

  17. genevieve smith
    August 23, 2018 at 2:10 pm

    I was talking to a man I met on facebook for several months. We exchanged pictures. He went on a business trip that was to last two weeks in Canada. I didn't hear from him for a few days. He then contacted through text message that he was in a hospital in Canada. His story was that he got off the plane got into a cab. The cab took him to a house unknown. Three me beat, rob him of all documentations money credit card phone. He was in the hospital 2 months. He had knee surgery, two strokes. I was sent emails with pictures of him in ER from his doctor. He convinced the doctors I was his wife. He would text me on the doctor or nurse phone. During this time he kept asking me to send him money. I stop hearing from him for one month. then the text started again. He said he had to leave the hospital and was staying with a friend and the friend had bought a phone for him. He asked me for 500.00$ for a plane ticket back to USA. He said he was looking for a small job to make money to fly home. Several days went by and I didn't hear from him. I sent a text telling him that I wanted a live video chat. I pressured him to let me see who I was talking to. They sent me more pictures of themself. I demanded a video chat. They started getting angry and out of character at this point and called me the bitch word. The conversation turned worse. I told him I didn't think he was the person I thought he was. He told me that he didn't need me anymore that he arrived in Washington D C two days ago. All this time he had filled me with promises of marriage, that he loved me. He was going to relocate to Florida where I live. The conversation got so bad that I deleted off the app hangout that we were text on. His words hurt me so much. I have not heard from him in 21 days now. He has all my information. I tried checking for information on him. He lied about where he worked. I contacted the company he was suppose to work at. I believe it was all a lie. It has broken my heart.

  18. Stevie
    August 20, 2018 at 1:19 pm

    My scammer said he was from Stuttgart, Germany and very quickly asked that we phone each other. I suggested WhatsApp and failed to notice that he didn't use the video but he mentioned it and told me he was too shy. He told me 'I was the one' after 2 conversations and must remove myself from the dating site and he would do the same. I found everything weird and his accent didn't sound German, He then told me he was travelling to Turkey to get supplies for his incredibly successful furniture company. When the plane landed he bombarded me with texts, One text said he was having difficulties with his online banking and by the way he was coming to visit me. This was all in less than one week of first contact. He rang me from 'Turkey' and kept calling me 'Sweetie' and wanted to let me know he was having online banking problems. I told him to contact his head office in German - this angered him and he started shouting that I didn't understand German business procedures. When I told him never to ring me again he began to bombard me with texts again - how sorry he was to have shouted at me, etc.I thought I had blocked him but he began ringing me at 2 and 3 in the morning. This time I successfully blocked him. The fabulous furniture shop etc in Stuttgart, doesn't exist.

  19. Christina
    July 14, 2018 at 4:39 pm

    I just blocked a guy who claims he wants to marry me. Stevenjames00000. Is a soldier in the United Peacekeeping mission in Syria. At first, it was innocent enough, and I spoke to him on Hangouts. Of course now he has my email, but I blocked him, because next he will be asking for money.

    • Doc
      October 10, 2018 at 3:10 pm

      I had a similar experience with "Kate Stevens" just as recently as a day ago. She first claimed to be a Sergeant First Class (Combat Medic) in the US Army then later claimed to be a Captain (Surgeon) in Syria.

      This started on Plenty of Fish or of them and went nearly instantly to Google Hangouts.

      Pictures were sent and I verified them as fake (belonging to former Miss Utah and Utah National Guard Sergeant Jill Stevens), yet she insisted that she was who she said she was. After that, I asked for a video chat and we did that. Although similar to the picture, there were obvious differences with her appearance and no sound on her end.

      Last week I decided to head right outside of Austin (Texas) to turn off the cell phone and disconnect for a few days. Right before I left, she started hitting me up for an iTunes Gift Card. I didn't think anything of it and went on about my trip. Apparently my absence caused her to hit me with a number of messages asking about it and demanded a prompt response.

      Having discovered my "exhaustive point" with the charade while sitting at the campfire, I pulled the proverbial plug on our conversation when I returned from Austin.

      With the people trying to claim to be military, there are a few things that you can do to call them out on it:
      1. If they have time to sit on an online dating site while downrange, they probably aren't downrange.
      2. If they claim that their job (Rating, MOS, AFSC, etc) is too Top Secret to discuss, that's a flag. Most SpecOps members have regular military jobs and the likeliness of coming across an Operator online is less than that of being struck by lightning.
      3. If they try to claim how there are no services available (Exchange or Commissary) where they are or how their CO/XO suspended Exchange function. CGX, BX/PX, NEX, and MCX all have online shopping, so that's out.

      Anyway, felt like telling my experience and give some pointers on how to avoid that stuff. Every woman I've ever begun talking to online to this point has asked me for everything from gift cards to shoes to sex toys. Had one literally ask me for my Credit Card information...yeah!

  20. Anita Sollars
    April 19, 2018 at 3:44 pm

    I have been talking with a gentleman for several months now. Have become attached. He wants me to actually get his visit visa from Pakistan for him. I am so confused. Please can you help me we FaceTime and talk on phone and text. He was on my Facebook. His fb name is Ali Azhar engineer.

    • Laura
      April 20, 2018 at 5:01 am

      Please discontinue talking with this man! A true Pakistani man would never ask a woman for help financially because of their pride and culture!

  21. James
    April 17, 2018 at 7:59 pm

    I found you can lose bank accounts, investments and such even if you don't own them.
    There was an elderly guy in the nursing home who gave his daughter power of attorney over his bank accounts and investments. The daughter began to abuse these accounts, withdrawing lots of cash, gambling it, and playing the big shot with her friends. I got on a date site and met this smoking hot babe from Indonesia 21 years my junior. We went pretty fast and we soon began to talk about our future together here in the US. I was asked to supply bank info to her so she could get her money out of her country. In short order I learned the bank accounts got closed and there were overdrafts, the investment house sent a letter wishing the client best wishes since these accounts got liquidated. The owner of the accounts was all pissed. Now I'm seeing people can get their money back they lost over the internet. How do you do that even if the accounts weren't yours to begin with? thanks

  22. Susan Smith
    January 21, 2018 at 1:26 am

    Hi, I have met many scammers on line,
    They normally sweet talk you for months on end. Then say after 3 months they come up with all kinds of excuses about why they need cash.
    One chap claimed he was on a oil rig and
    His expensive digger equipment fell into the sea. As soon as I said I had no funds,
    He disappeared into thin air.
    Another chap in New York, claimed he lost his wallet, he left it in a cafe apparently.
    So I said did you report it to the police?
    Another time the same chap "William Koch" claimed that he was in hospital and needed funds for a operation.
    Another us army officer claimed his son was ill and needed cash to help him.
    All these men disappear once they realise there is no money for them.
    I find British men are even worse, because a lot seem to take pride in showing their private parts off.Its a shame that there is not a sex site where men pay up front before being rude and offensive to women.
    It makes it very difficult to meet a true genuine partner.

  23. Neil Cook
    December 2, 2017 at 5:37 pm

    Http mettin discreet. Com babehere is a fraud

  24. L C
    October 2, 2017 at 1:45 am

    So I recently started talking to a woman from Ghana who found my profile on a site.... We have video chatted a few times on Hangouts and it is the same person in the pics that were sent to me... It took a couple of weeks before I was asked for money to pay for a passport renewal.... Then for a medical examination to be able to leave the country. Reluctantly I sent the money with her promising to send me proof which she has done. Now though she is telling me that there is a police background check that she has to do and after that she can travel here to the states... She says she has a sister living in Taylor Michigan which is just outside of Detroit (I live in Columbus Ohio). I have told her that I can not send anymore money as I am behind on bills and still getting my life together from a divorce earlier this year, she then says ok no worries and that she will figure it out... Has not asked for any more money but still talks to me everyday and still video calls me.... I thought at first it was a scam but then little things seemed to real to be fake. It has been 4 days since I told her no and she still gets ahold of me to talk and get to know each other better. She says her name is Sherry Walker and I have seen that name on scam reports but with different pictures and what not... Keep in mind I have seen her quite a few times because we do video chat and is the same person in the pictures that have been sent... Has anyone else here been contacted by a 27yr old with a certificate in accounting from Ghana named Sherry Walker? Not sure what to do as I am not sending anymore money and she says she will figure it out... Should I wait to see if she really does come up with it and comes here or should I cut her off? Other than the passport renewal nothing has been a flag and like I said she is willing to come up with costs on her own... Is this normal in scams?

    • Dennis Nilsson
      October 23, 2017 at 6:43 pm

      How had you "video chatted a few times on Hangout" with "her"? With text or the spoken word?

      Usually the scammers are using prerecorded videos of a nice woman, and are playing that video for you. And always it is some trouble with the webcam's microphone, so you could never conversate with the spoken word with "her".

      You could easy check if the Hangout is in realtime. Ask "her" to put "her's" one, or both hands somewhere on "her's" face. If she wouldn't do that, or ask if you don't trust "her", then "she" is surely a guy playing with your feelings. Hang off. And don't get involved in further converstion.

      Remember also that when you are showing yourself on webcam, the scammer is surely recording you, to use your video to scamm other people, possible a lonely women. So take precasuion that "she" is not prerecorded, before show yourself on a webcam.

      Several scammers have tried that on me, and I have learned my lesson.

      • Mark
        December 15, 2017 at 7:45 am

        Watch out for military or police women. Or any make that says he is a Legionnaires.. I am one we where taught from selection to lie and steal. If a woman will not look up what your Regement is she real? Most soldiers will not give there picture is a reliably probable. No Legionare will give his picture. It is not right to our Code of Conduct. And as I have said before, military personnel have financial backers, even if it is by mates. And when my uncle did die, The Legion was going to send me home...for free! And not on a CF130. A real airline, and I was in Chad when that happened, so...If a“soldier “ is asking for money...bad scam!!!!
        But don’t bash a man for saying “love” or “baby” Canadians and other people say that all the time. I know that, but if a Canadian is not polite, not a Canadian! And women...Canadians do not say “eh” or “a” that is a Bob and Dug Makenzy jolk from “Saturday Night Live”
        If a Canadian says “I love u a” you are not talking to a Canadian. No Canuk talks like than unless we are playing stupid to a Yanky.
        Oh...and a beaver is an animal, on our 5c coin...and only a Canadian will be confused by what an Europe Elk is compared to a North America Elk, I have had many conversations about Elk, moose and Wapitie.

      • Kunal
        January 23, 2018 at 9:35 am

        This has happened with me too!
        What should I do? I have been asked to pay 500$ for deleting my video recording. Please help me

        • Laura
          April 20, 2018 at 5:05 am

          Contact law enforcement!!!

    • Dennis Nilsson
      October 23, 2017 at 6:44 pm

      How had you "video chatted a few times on Hangout" with "her"? With text or the spoken word?

      Usually the scammers are using prerecorded videos of a nice woman, and are playing that video for you. And always it is some trouble with the webcam's microphone, so you could never conversate with the spoken word with "her".

      You could easy check if the Hangout is in realtime. Ask "her" to put "her's" one, or both hands somewhere on "her's" face. If she wouldn't do that, or ask if you don't trust "her", then "she" is surely a guy playing with your feelings. Hang off. And don't get involved in further converstion.

      Remember also that when you are showing yourself on webcam, the scammer is surely recording you, to use your video to scamm other people, possible a lonely women. So take precasuion that "she" is not prerecorded, before show yourself on a webcam.

      Several scammers have tried that on me, and I have learned my lesson.

      November 5, 2017 at 5:28 pm

      She is a scammer I should know I have used by a guy using ericrodi009 on instagram for money he has destroyed my life My name is Debbie from NY if you just want to talk my instagram is princessme14148396 send friend request t

      • Mark
        December 15, 2017 at 7:46 am

        I did try to contact luck. I know all the scams now

        • Debbie
          December 15, 2017 at 6:03 pm

          Nobody called me. Ericrodi009 is a scammer from Lagos Nigeria who has hurt me deeply his real name is Eric Olu akande. He is not white like what he said my name is Debbie on instagram I am Missghettoville if you want to reach me

    • Jef
      December 15, 2017 at 12:01 am

      Dude the worst for me was a Ghana chick, or being on Victoria Hearts. Now my own profile is being used to scam women. And I hate that.

    • Peter
      December 24, 2017 at 12:16 pm

      Oops is all I can say.

      I met a Ghanaian lady here in the UK FOR REAL via an ad I’d placed in a local newspaper. She phoned me at 12:30 in the morning and after a one chat, we agreed to speak to one another. The thing was that I stared to fall for he and WANTED to believe what she was telling me. Every single thing I wanted and lusted after she could fulfil. Did she like other women? Oh yes and she gave me some Oscar winning sex talk. Did she like me? Indeed. We met up and she was beyond beautiful a clone of the pop singer Amii Stewart . She kept ringing me and I couldn’t get enough.What could possibly go wrong? A hidden agenda that’s what. I’ve no doubt now she was up to something and would have scammed me had I been wealthy. What gave it away? A total lack of any respect for my time, breaking appointments, not keeping her word, having excuses for everything and finally her blaming me when she was in the wrong. Off she went. FORTUNATELY I had no inheritance or divorce settlement to be scammed out of. My biggest enemy here was myself WANTING to believe she actually loved me. She didn’t and was soon off onto the next man, I wasn’t happy at the time but looking back on it I’m just glad it petered out when it did.

      DON’T SEND ANY MONEY and if things got as far as they did for me without money, imagine what will happen to you if you do in fact have money.

      • Laura
        April 20, 2018 at 5:06 am

        Good for you!

    • Laura
      April 20, 2018 at 5:04 am

      Yes it is normal—they won’t give up!!!!

  25. Julie
    September 30, 2017 at 8:20 pm

    I've just been scammed by a guy he payed me compliments and told me he loved me and I believed him I fell in love with him stupidly had cybersex with him and told him a lot of info I got suspicious after he asked for money and he kept saying his phone battery was dying and he often left the conversation after I would not give him what he wanted the money the I tunes card he so wants I told him I can't afford to and I was depressed from him blanking me and making me feel guilty don't fall for it it's all crap block them please don't them get in to your heart and do what it's done to me I'm now so depressed and heartbroken a mess save yourself before it gets to serious

    • Annonomus
      September 5, 2018 at 1:00 pm

      I’m in a similar situation. I know in my heart he is a scammer but then I question myself. He asked me for a gift card and then to help with money and back to school supplies. I refused each time and blocked him on Hangouts but he texted me and promised he would never ask me for money again so I unblocked him. All the photos of him are legit and not of someone else’s profile. It has got pretty steamy between us and he has sent me pictures of his private parts but I have refused to send any nude photos of myself. I am so addicted to the attention but I’m fully aware of what he is probably about and I’m very careful what I say and do. Is there any harm just going along with it for fun?

  26. tinker bell
    September 14, 2017 at 12:58 am

    I met this guy on the dating site a month a go. He said he is currently deployed i Nigeria. Just the way goes on getting to know each other process asking such questions. He said he was divorsed having a 3 year old daughter. I asked photos & he consistently sent me pictures of him having his face, his daughter & even his brother. He said he ia from SD. His deployment will end this Oct. A ccouple of weeks we lost communication for 3 days, then when he got back he said he needes $100 for internet connection to keep communication. He also mentioned he was just connecting to his roommate's wifi. He call each other everyday via whatsapp (but no video, since he saod is banned). Now he is asking $200 for his vaction papers. I told him i could not raise it. He responded "just try your best so he can come over here & get his fees once he is on vacation". I informed his that US ARMY vaction papers has no cost at all, then he stated "would you think i lie". He wanted me to send money to his commanders info. I said i cannot, he gave me a bitcoin code rather.

    Hope someone can check for me; I got his pictures that he sent if that is really him.
    Name:Michael Bowman


    • dw
      September 16, 2017 at 10:46 pm

      what's to check? it's a scam. Don't send him anything; cut off all communication with him.

      • ALEXIS
        November 3, 2017 at 2:38 am

        I've been asked by 10 different guys in the military from different places have asked me to send them $50 itunes cards. Is this a scam.

        • Jef
          December 15, 2017 at 12:22 am

          Soldiers make enough money... they should not ask for money. I used to be one....I know this, and we have financial assistance. My problem is I use my original email account. Try and explain the name “Mark Walker “ when that was my Legion Etrangere name...I get blamed as being a scammer and even blocked sometimes...but it is also a really good way to see if a woman rembers my real name.

    • TR
      September 21, 2017 at 8:45 pm

      I've had a very similar experience. My scammer is in the Italian Army based in Poland on deployment until next November. They asked me for an iTunes voucher for $100. I sent nothing and stopped all contact.

      I've also reported this to the online fraud team here in the U.K., informed the dating app company and put a "watch" on all my accounts and data for the next two years. And closed down all my social media accounts as they had some personal data about me.

      Don't send any money and block / end all contact with the scammer asap.

      • Laura
        April 20, 2018 at 5:08 am

        Good job!

  27. Ruth Bandy
    September 12, 2017 at 7:00 pm

    How can I block someone that I think is trying to scam me on my email chat without this person knowing it hes always asking me to send him money,I think he also has a fake marriage certificate made up wanting me to sign of which I have refused I have refused to send any money but how can I block this person without him knowing it,he has lead me to believe he wants to marry me.

    • Dennis Nilsson
      October 23, 2017 at 6:57 pm

      Never use your real and private e-mail when you are conversating with people you have never met. Register a new e-mail at Gmail, Hotmail or Yandex, only for "dating" purpose.

      When you are sure that the person is not a scammer/deciever, you have meet him, or doing webcam with functional camera and microphone, you could tell him your private e-mail-adress.

  28. Cynthia Crawford
    September 11, 2017 at 7:44 am

    Within a month, I have had two men try scamming me. The first ones' name was Francis P. William. He began by asking me to email him. He then asked me to close my dating site account, I am assuming that was to test my willingness to trust him. He always said he had work to do and couldn't meet with me but I e would soon. He then only emailed and texted me when he only lived 20 mins away. He "couldn't" even meet me for coffee. He then tells me the next week that he will be in Germany for 6 weeks. He said both his biological parents were Italian, then why was his last name William. I seriously doubted he would be in any type of witness protection program. Btw, he told me he loved me within the first couple days. Sent me pictures of his kids, everything. He video chatted with me for 50 seconds two or three times. Everyday his emails became more affectionate and racy. Finally around the third week he tells me a part for work was shipped broken and he had to gather as much money as possible to pay for a new one. He said, I just need $10,000.00 more. I found it interesting that he was supposed to be in Germany but he needed $10,000.00 not $8,330.45 euro. I also found it funny that it was exactly $10,000.00 he needed. I also found a pic he sent me, he said HE took this pic. I found it on the internet. I reported him to the FBI. THEN, shortly after that, I got involved with another piece of garbage. The name he used was Michael Asare. The picture was great, but later that night when he sent another photo it didn't match. Before that, he once again, asked me for my password, so that he could cancel my dating site. I said I will do it as its no big deal to reinstate on after we began chatting, Everything seemed okay until I noticed some of the things he said contradicted his other statements. On the website it said, ND. I then asked him where he lived he said FL. He then said he was on business in Ghana. BIG FLAG, refused to tell me the business he worked for. Had nasty attitude cuz I asked. Actor he thought he had smoothed things over he asked for my address. I gave him someone else's address. He said he had a surprise for me. I acted all excited. As we were talking I am conducting research about him. Found 46 hits on a scammer website. I then cursed him out and called him a scammer and told him I was going to report him. He got very upset when the person he sent pizza to took it I guess cuz I didn't get it and he was charged $85.00.

  29. Cherie Snyder
    September 9, 2017 at 3:21 am

    I too have had the lovely pleasure of such scam artists. One a guy who was on an oil rig...left his son with nanny at home...didn't leave enough money so could I send some..
    The second one was A Doctor doing humanitarian work for the UN in Syria. He never asked for money but wanted me to apply for him to come home on a leave...wanted me to pretend to be his sister or lover.for all I know he could have been a terroist.
    The third is hard on me...liked the guy a lot..claimed to be a structural engineer and won a bid on a contract in Malaysia. Was time to come home but government there wanted him to pay the income tax on the projected earnings before he left...well of course he didn't have the money and it would take two weeks to get from his bank and he didn't want to be stuck there for that long. Good thing I am poor because I didn't have the money to send and told him so.
    All three were sure I was the gal for them and that we would be together one day! Hah!

    • Cynthia Crawford
      September 11, 2017 at 7:50 am

      OMG , I think you and i were scammed by the same guy. This guy had salt n pepper colored hair and a goatee. He had a son & daughter. . . he says.

      • Erin
        January 20, 2019 at 5:10 pm

        Was the third guy in Az? I think I'm talking to him now?

      • Erin
        January 20, 2019 at 5:12 pm

        Was the structural engineer located in Az? Did he claim to be married for 30 years?

    • Margo
      February 23, 2018 at 2:29 am

      The first guy you mentioned...
      Did he go by the name Gary Osmond?
      Wife died of breast cancer. On oil rig as a seismic interpretor? Has a son he leaves with nanny but won't say nanny's name.

  30. Lisa Sileo
    August 30, 2017 at 5:26 pm

    Yes, I was recently scammed by a man who claimed to be American. He
    told me he was a civil engineer working in South Africa. He told me his wife had died from cancer. He also told me he wanted to marry me.(after two weeks? ) I always suspected something was wrong. He asked for money help on the last e-mail. I called my sister and she reminded me it was a scam. I still had
    feelings for him, until that day. Please, be careful ladies. (and men).

  31. Tom
    August 19, 2017 at 4:15 pm

    Scammers are looking for female victims, you say? Most scammers that have victimized me have been young females.

  32. Pauloherlihy
    August 10, 2017 at 4:22 am

    I met girl online skout app she gave me phone number I rang her she real she gave telegram messenger app we text each other all she wanted my money I look up Facebook no profile She want me transfer money into bank account she said she loves me want me is she scamming me money

    • Marc
      February 4, 2018 at 7:59 am


    • Laura
      April 20, 2018 at 5:09 am

      Hell yes!!! Delete asap!!!

  33. ConcernedNiece
    July 12, 2017 at 1:18 pm

    I'm writing because I have concerns that my aunt is currently being romanced by a scammer. She's 69, overweight, been divorced over 10 years, and hasn't dated at all in that time. She does have a 19 yr old daughter and has prob poured her time into that. But, she started talking to a guy on Our last week. Within a couple days of making a profile. She's never been on a dating site before. He is supposedly 64 (looks like mid 50's to me), wife died of cancer, has a son, and lives a couple hrs from where we do in Alabama, BUT he is currently in Michigan for work b/c that is where he is from and has a business there. He also has told her he will be traveling to Mexico soon for work. I think she said he has a scrap metal business. Within a day or of meeting online he told her he was taking his profile down b/c he had met the woman for him. He then sent her a YouTube video of a song called "God Sent Me You" or something. She ate that up.

    He says he has a sister that has cancer here in Alabama that he says he helps care for. He has a foreign accent, speaks broken English, and says his family is of German descent. He is younger, attractive, has photos he has sent her of a red Mercedes in front of a large home and of him driving a boat. I Google image searched all of his photos with little luck. But, 2 of the photos matched seemingly fake LinkedIn profiles for a man with a different name. The guy on the profiles lives in LA, has a master's in engineering from Oxford, and is an account executive at the World Bank for 45 yrs. Believable, right? So, I sent those profiles to my aunt and she is supposedly done with him. Well he convinced her his former business partner embezzled all of his assets and scammed him. He told her that is also why he has no social media presence. She totally believes it. So that was 2 days ago and yesterday she was tickled to death b/c she got a call from an online gift company that's delivering her a $140 6ft pink Teddy bear. *Gag* According to her daughter she has been talking to him non stop, via text, phone, or email. We have tried to get her to video chat with him or to ask for a photo with her name and the date on it. She has refused. I think she wants to continue living in Lala land. We just don't know how to get through to her. The guy in the pictures is way too attractive and young for her, so she probably doesn't want to mess it up is my guess.

    I was like you've given him your address to send you a Teddy Bear and even if he is the guy in the photos he could be a criminal, convicted sex offender, etc. She says "he's so genuine and honest".

    So thoughts? Any doubt she's being scammed?

    • Dennis Nilsson
      September 13, 2017 at 10:03 am

      If I Google image search doesn't find the pictures you are researching, use the other reverse imaging sites, as and

      I have found that you have to use all three search enginees, to get the best chance to find any unknown photos.

      Remember also that make a new search some days after the first search. The image that the search sites find, is updated regulary.

    • mikr
      January 30, 2018 at 10:38 pm

      well ladies and gentle men,i cant tell u how many times ive been scamed or tryied to be scamed iam getting to be a pro at spotting them.i must look like a easy mark tender heart is my curse i geuss.lonely people are easy targets,shame they have to pick on lovers.well anyway my first was a lady or person of a web site called meet me,they start with the most pretty knock down drag out pics then its can you buy me a card itunes or amazon gift cards.some say their from africa or the states.they never give u a phone number or address for flowers they always want u to walmart to walmart your money or money gram never credit cards they always have an excuess why you cant use them.ask for a pic of them standing in front of a mirror tell them to write you name on it with the date. out of all scammers i meet they all say i cant or i dont have a mirror ha ha who doesnt have a mirror.well iam up to about 2000 bucks lost to these liars.i geuss thats my fault for being so trusting and soft live and learn

    • Laura
      April 20, 2018 at 5:10 am

      No you are correct! Get real!!!

  34. Aquagirl
    July 2, 2017 at 12:25 am

    Hi, I had this guy, who suddenly appear in my facebook sending me a friend request..since I am into online networking business, I thought he is interested in my online marketing, so I accepted his friend request.. I checked his fb profile, and saw only very few post..on his cover photo, he was sitting in a very luxurious car..he told me that he is still new in fb, so there is no other photos on it. He told me, if we can chat on hangouts, so i said ok..when I we chatted on hang outs, he ask me eagerly about myself, so I told him, why dont you be the one to tell me about yours, so, he told so many things about himself, he isaid he is a chief engineer wirking in oil rig, he is from uk but he was currently at the atlantic ocean. He is a widower, he has a 12 yr old son..his wife died in malaria during her work in africa and nigeria...but later in our conversation, he suddenly expressed her interst in me..he said he is retiring soon and he wants to settle down with me..I was shocked because we did not know each other well.. I told him that I have a bf, and he never mind about it..he is 49 yrs old and is retiring too soon??? He said he was si busy, he only gets a vacation once every very unusual for a guy to express his feelings so very quick...because I am in diubt, I did not chatted him anymore, and blocked him in hangouts. I even uninstalled my hungots so that he cant disturb me you think he is a scammer,? His name is COLLIN ERICSON, I search his name in google, but i dont see his profile info in that made me think he is really a scammer...

    • tipstir
      July 3, 2017 at 8:36 am

      Yes that's a scammer.. Very good you spotted that he was from Nigeria. Everything else he told you was a lie. I got a women from Nigeria telling me she was searching and find me and thought it would be nice to get to know me. I didn't think nothing of it until she started to love me already. What?? It's been 1 month into this. Who ever is behind all of this has spent a lot of money in data. She contacts me every day. She's a student, works at salon and runs jewelry business as well. The read Flag was that she said some guys came into the studio and said for 350,000 nira she could get a visa to US. 450,000 nira she could stay with her husband in US for 2 years on visa. You see all this is false the price is less than 60,000 Nira. I feel like this is such a waste of time. Then she send me a copy of her Nigerian passport. I have notice that it has errors in the spelling and birth year is looks like it was made from the number 6 instead of 9. Goes to show you what they would do for the money. I confronted her about all of this but she said what am I talking about. I doubt she's be coming here real soon. Because they never do, if you don't pay for it but even if you do they still won't come because they no you will keep sending the money. Why leave your country to go and see the guy or girl sending you money for hopes, dreams and non-visit..

      • Dennis Nilsson
        September 13, 2017 at 10:30 am

        My suggestion is that, when you have chatted via some 5-7 days, ask "her/him" to turn on "her/his" webcam.

        Usually "she" answering that "she" don't have any webcam.

        I therefore ask "her" to buy a webcam. And that I am pausing our conversation til I can see the person I am chatting with. If it is a real person, she/he will also be interested to see you on webcam.

        Some of the "women" told me that they are working for UN i Syria, U.S Army and aren't allowed to use any webcam.

        Some others has complained, that I don't trust them.

        Some had answered that they will fix a webcam and get back to me.

        A funny "woman" asked me to send money to her, to buy a webcam. This "business-woman" pretended to be from Canada/U.S, but we're living in U.K. I told her that I will buy her a webcam through a Internet-shop in U.K directly, if she give me her address where it could be delivered. But she insisted that she wanted me to send money.

        No one of this "women" has get back to me.

        But I had some success. At last, I meet a local girl, to my surprise, living in my neighborhood.

        • Laura
          April 20, 2018 at 5:11 am

          Good ideas!

  35. David Mercer
    June 19, 2017 at 4:48 am

    Beware of a scammer using the name Katie Morgan claiming to live in Orlando Florida and has a daughter named Vera. She lives in Lagos Nigeria and may have you send her money through another person via Western Union or MoneyGram. She may eventually ”come clean" with you admitting she lives in Ikeja Lagos Nigeria and has a friend named Nneka and tells you you can send money to her in the name Katie Morgan Nneka because the banks there won't allow her to receive money using her "actual" name. This person will swear her undying love and may refer to you as her "King". If you say you're done with her she'll say she's going to commit suicide. May even tell you she's either in the hospital or just got out of the hospital.

  36. David Mercer
    June 19, 2017 at 4:31 am

    I was caught in a romance scam for over a year. This person told me they lived in another state but would not call. Money was sent to this person (several thousand dollars, as they told me they were divorced after her ex abandoned her and her daughter). After six months of being lied to this person "came clean" and told me her daughter was living with her aunt in the US and that her ex abandoned her in Nigeria with nothing but her luggage. Said her name is Katie Morgan but had Western Union/Money Gram transfers always sent to others as the banks in Nigeria wouldn't allow transfers to be sent in her name because it wasn't a Nigerian name. Then I was told it had met a lady that she'd became good friends with named Nneka and that I could send money to her in the name Katie Morgan Nneka. That was the final straw and I've since stopped talking to this person and changed my phone number.

    • tipstir
      July 3, 2017 at 8:42 am

      The're out there they want your money because they're the winner you are the loser. They have their own song about. Never give them money, they will do everything they can to get your money. I smart they will never get it. I would like to see one of them actually fly here. Western Union is suppose to ask you how long you know this person and protect you from sending the money. You don't know this girl she's a fake and lair. They just want the money nothing else matters just the money!

  37. NotFallingForIt
    June 15, 2017 at 12:59 am

    Are you really trying to offer another scam on an article that talks about how to be aware of scams? Recommend deleting this post above.

  38. Dawn Roberts
    June 11, 2017 at 10:18 am

    All, beware of Fred Jacobson. Scammer! I wish I knew how to report him to the authorities.

  39. Beverly
    June 6, 2017 at 8:35 pm

    In this article they suggest a search, for someone you think may be trying to scam you, says the search is free... so you type in your first, last name and email address. The next screen asks for a credit card number and which option you'd like to use?? Why did the previous screen say 'free' if it's not actually free. That sounds like a scam right there.

  40. Lee Hargadon
    May 25, 2017 at 9:31 am

    I'm in contact with a orthopaedic doctor, who tells me his in Ukraine, we've been chatting every day for some time now. He claims to have two young sons, firstly he asked me for iTunes card so he could communicate with his boys, i was stupid enough to get him £15 of them, then next UN hadn't delivered supplies, so he was hungry and dirty, he asked for £200, which i said i would try and get but never . Then last night he said could i get £150 because supplies still not arrived. He constantly tells me how much i mean to him, but don't they all? Since joining a dating site, think I've had more scammers than hot dinners.
    I chat with him on viber, what should I do?

    • Dann Albright
      May 29, 2017 at 9:02 pm

      Sounds like the best thing to do is just cease all contact. All of that sounds like typical scam techniques, and it'll be easier to just cut off all communication.

    • Beverly
      June 6, 2017 at 8:40 pm

      Wow that sounds very much like the man I've been talking to...I met him on
      He also asked me for an ITunes card, then last night he asked me for money because he's out at sea working on oil spillages and his contract is at risk because he miscalculated and now they have run out of chemicals. If he doesn't get the money he will lose the contract and not get paid for all his time, efforts and hard work (and will not get paid) as they will reassign the contract elsewhere. I could go on but it sounds like we're taking to the same man....or men who have been trained the same way.

      • Frances
        August 17, 2017 at 4:15 am

        Beverly that sounds a lot like this guy that is communicating with me. Brian Reynolds with a heavy accent. Portuguese descent. Needed an iTunes 100 card to continue to chat since his phone card was getting low and couldn't leave his job site to buy one. There are a million of them out there

      • Bee
        September 18, 2018 at 7:01 pm

        Sounds like a man I met on Match. He is on an oil rig and lost some equipment. Wanted me to send money to help pay for it. Now he is asking me to send money to help his daughter supposedly. Hmmm wonder if he is the same man.

    • Beverly
      June 6, 2017 at 9:19 pm

      Reading these posts I'm shocked to see how much scamming seems to be "a thing" now days. I've had two attempts made on me in the last 3 months; and luckily I didn't fall for it. I met the first one on FB and only accepted his friend request because we had a friend in common. I went to his timeline to see who the friend was, and it was a childhood friend I've known since the 3rd grade. Strange though.... she was his ONLY friend. Now after this has happened again, and the 2 men sounded like the same man (probably was); I've been online the last two days looking at sites like this one... "how to spot and avoid dating scammers" and come to find out, all the hints they say to be on the lookout for, matched both men; and gullible me, I still wanted to give this last one the benefit of the doubt. It's amazing how we can become attached to, and really start to care about someone just through conversation! My friends kept telling me to watch out, and I said that he hadn't asked me for money as the first one had. Lo and behold 2 days later he asked if I could send him an ITunes card, I though that wasn't asking for much considering he's out at sea, etc.... so I sent a $50.00 gift card. Then 4 days later (last night) he wanted a lot more, for a seemingly good reason, but when I told him no, he turned very cold, where before, he was madly in love and couldn't wait to meet, that I was the best woman that he'd had the good fortune to meet, yada yada yada. Luckily I wasn't taken for more. As much as I liked him and wanted to meet him eventually I figured $50.00 wouldn't hurt me. So I know much more now after going to these sites on how to spot and avoid scammers, but it's just too emotionally draining ; I went to the Catholic dating site where I met him and opted out on renewing my subscription. Mine expires in November and I will not be renewing it. I'm very wary now about meeting someone online who is honest and trustworthy, who wants a relationship and not money. Well I wish everyone luck, just be very careful out there in cyberspace. Too bad the old saying is true..."if it sounds too good to be true...."

      • Frances
        August 17, 2017 at 4:18 am

        I feel ya sister!!! Same thing. Brian Reynolds. Gorgeous. Probably stole those pics. Told him no to iTunes card.

  41. Pat
    May 5, 2017 at 1:39 am

    I did the dumbest thing ever. I actually started talking to man through his email. He was going to be leaving the site soon etc. With in seven days we had 48 pages of emails. None of his information could be verified. A meeting had been set up, but postponed because he had to go to the UK on business. He knew I had no money up front, why keep up the front? He claimed to be pretty wealthy, but when I checked where he said he lived, it was cockroach infested apartments in very bad section of town. The real kicker he was out of town (supposedly local) at the time, and he asked me what airport he had to fly into to get to our locality. The idiot didn't know how to get home. REALLY!!!!!

    • Dann Albright
      May 13, 2017 at 5:53 pm

      Yeah, that sounds pretty suspicious. Glad you saw through it. :-)

  42. Blue
    April 26, 2017 at 3:06 am

    I think my friend is being groomed by a scammer. Its happening on facebook. On her page she only has pictures of herself and some of my friend that he sent her. She has no friends listed on her page. Its like she has no life. He is too innocent to see it. She is young and pretty, he is 48 and bald.. Her name on fb is sandra ashlyn from california city california. I really hope he doesnt get conned out of any money.

    • Nona
      April 29, 2017 at 7:09 pm

      I think you're right. I've seen "California City, CA" and "Oregon City, OR" and "Michigan City, MI" etc. on so many profiles that scream scam that it makes me think these scammers aren't very creative! I wish we didn't have to wade through all this crap to find love. I've given up on it. I would date a guy who is 48 and bald (maybe because I'm an age appropriate match), but I can't find any who are real and who aren't looking for 28-year-old women. Sigh. I hope your friend survives this without losing his life savings.

      • Dann Albright
        May 13, 2017 at 5:38 pm

        Well, to be completely fair, California City and Oregon City are real places.

    • Dann Albright
      May 13, 2017 at 5:37 pm

      That does sound a bit like a scam, but it's always hard to tell. Have there been any updates since you posted this?

  43. James Lara
    April 24, 2017 at 1:44 am

    I'm devastated. I met this girl on Skout, and at first, everything was coming along at a nice pace, we started talking around midnight, but everything escalated quickly. She is from CA, like me, but "working" in Nigeria. That same night, she told she was out of the country for research and her debit card wasn't working. She said she would be home in two weeks from the day we met, which will be three days from the day I am posting this. She said she needed to pay her phone bill so she would be able to talk to me. I payed her through Western Union. She then needed grocery money, so i then payed her the next couple days. I even called her out that this was a scam, and she said she would never scam me or hurt me. We argued for a while asking what is her benefit from scamming me, and i told her my money. She never left. I asked her to send a photo of herself with a sign with my name, which I did for her, and the photo looked photoshopped. I called her out on it and she got mad, but she sent me a real photo with her same top, just without the sign. I helped her out with groceries on and off until she told me if she doesn't pay her hotel bill, she will go to jail. She sent me a picture of a check from a restaurant in Tennessee, where she is not from, and asked me to put it in my account, cash it, then wire it to her. I told her no, this is a scam. She said she was heartbroken because I thought she was fake. We argued all day that day and she said she just wanted to see me. She said i don't need to deposit the money and that she will be fine. She said she just wants my love. In her country, it is an 8 hour time difference, and she said she literally hated working out there. She text me when she got up, she even fell asleep a couple times. She seemed legit. And she wasn't even model-type, she was really cute though with live selfies. She sent me many pictures of herself and no similar images popped up with reverse image search. I sent her a couple of mine, and she said no dirty pics, and she said she is a virgin. I don't know what to believe honestly, I'm 99% sure this is a scam lol

    • Dann Albright
      May 13, 2017 at 5:31 pm

      It's impossible to say for sure, but that definitely sounds like a scam to me. Be careful!

    • Ja
      May 28, 2017 at 2:48 pm

      Really. Its a scam. When they ask for money then it is a scam. If not, then that person is just using you for money.

    • Zap
      June 9, 2017 at 9:59 am

      Tell her to come and meet you and you will REIMBURSE HER plane ticket 5 times over.
      If she is legit she will come.

      If she refuses = scam.
      I did this with a TON of Philippino women who "loved" me.

    • Dennis Nilsson
      September 13, 2017 at 10:43 am

      ". I asked her to send a photo of herself with a sign with my name....and the photo looked photoshopped.."

      Special "photoshop" software is available on the Internet, where you could type in whatever text you want, in the sign.

  44. Mr P
    February 9, 2017 at 9:10 am

    I got talking to a woman on a dating site. The conversation moved from the site to whatsapp and we have been talking on whatsapp for a long time in the evening and she is sending videos and images of herself. Everything being talked about is normal in the conversation and nothing out of the ordinary. Tuesday she said that she needed to go to casablanca for a meeting about some affairs. Then on wednesday she said that the meeting is not going well and that she needs to send a package to france and could I receive this package. It is at this moment I knew that it was a scam, so now I am playing the scammer. My best line so far has been that I have shown her photo to my friend who is a policeman and he thinks that you are really cute and that he looks forward to meeting you. I have given all her details to the local police.

    • Dann Albright
      February 11, 2017 at 4:25 pm

      I like this idea!

  45. Mike
    January 14, 2017 at 9:45 am

    I fell into it too met this really pretty woman online kept saying she loved me all the time long story short bought her a cell phone calls me can barely understand her such bs got me to purchase a plane ticket well i stopped it she goes by the name juliet corsy, or ruth juliet anni , she has 3 phone numbers all differnt locations she will say she's rich has money coming to her dont believe it its all bullshit

    • Dann Albright
      January 18, 2017 at 11:41 pm

      It's certainly not just women that are affected by this. Thanks for sharing your story.

      • Zap
        June 9, 2017 at 10:01 am

        Actually it's mostly men who are the victims by "young women" and older women who are scammed by "younger men".

        Nobody knows the real sex of the scammer though...

        • meg
          June 21, 2017 at 12:06 am

          hi zap,

          im a filipina, but how sure are you that these filipino women are really scamming you? I thnk im being scammed too. He pretended to be in Milwaukee WI, but the phne number he's using is from TX. and his accent is like a nigerian guy. good thing no other info has been divulged to this guy yet, although before , he asked me how much i earn for a living and my bank details too, since he wants to send me some packages full of clothers, gadgets, shoes, and even appliances. LOL. I think its just stupid to believe that easily, but it is just but normal to give these people the benefit of the doubt that maybe, just maybe, they like you for real reasons.. Oh well...

  46. Anonymous
    December 18, 2016 at 7:03 am

    I started dating a guy from Ghana and we had been talking for almost four months. In the first month he asked would I be supportive of him and I asked what did he mean and he said if I could help him get a place because he lived with a friend and had no privacy. That was strange he would ask that but when I explained to him I couldn't he understood and never asked again. Next month he claimed to have been using someones phone and that he had to return it. We went from talking everyday to barely talking and I had got use to talking everyday, so when he asked if I could help him with a new phone I helped him. I sent him $100 Not too much but thats all i could do. He wanted me to western union the money which I did and he told me he didnt have a id and that I had to put his friend name down because he was going to have his friend do it and I did. These things didnt really sit well with me but I continued to talk to him because he was very nice. It wasnt until recently (a few days ago to be exact) that I realized I am being scammed. Like we video chat and everything...but while we were video chatting he told me someone from the UK has contacted him. He said his mother passed away 2 years ago and they wanted to give him what she left behind. First thing is he never told me his mother passed and when he was saying it he appeared to be very sad... so he says the lady doesnt want to send the money straight to him because she doesnt want it to get traced because other people in the company does not want him to have the money. He asks if I can deposit the money in my bank account then send it to him. So when he said this "woman" needs some info from me to make the deposit I said ok. He says she wants my name, address, bank name, bank number, account number routing number, online account and pswd, and my ssn THAT WAS MY DEFINITE RED FLAG. Im like why does she need all this and he says she need it for the deposit. Im telling him she would not need all that, but he's trying to pressure me to do it and saying I need to trust him. I kept saying a relationship with no trust is no relationship at all. So i started looking up things online and thats how I noticed I was being scammed. From the strong feelings so fast, to the love quotes, just everything they speak of online is what I'm dealing with. The crazy thing is his profile is real, we video chat and everything. It hurts so bad to know that I have been talking to someone for 4 months developing real true genuine feelings and the whole time he was after my money. I am only 28 and so is he say... idk what to do, but I needed to share my story. Im so ashamed because he has photos of me and my address. Idk whats to come next...???

    • Dann Albright
      December 28, 2016 at 7:11 pm

      Yeah, requesting all of that information is definitely a warning sign. I'm glad to hear that you thought of that right away! Many people don't realize it until later.

    • Dennis Nilsson
      September 13, 2017 at 11:07 am

      Thanks for you took the time to write about your experience.

      Check if the pictures you've sent him are published on dating sites and pretend to be a girl looking for their partner in life. Use Internet Reverse Image Search.

      If you find your photos, please contact the dating department and tell them to delete the fake profile.

      If you have bad luck this unscrupulous guy could have recorded your video conversation and will use it to scam other but, pretending to be you. Or he will sell the video to other scammers.

      I got in an video-conversation with a fine woman around 30, living in Ghana. The funny thing was, that her microphone wasn't functioning. So I asked her via chat to put her hands on her ears. Then "she" complained why I don't trusted her.

      She never put her hands on her ears. The reason that I asked, was that if it was a real time video, it would been easy for her, to put her hands on her ears. I'm sure that the scammer was playing a prerecorded video with som woman he have scammed.

      So be aware when you do a video-conversation with somebody unknown. It could be recorded, and used to scam other people.

  47. cc Clean
    October 24, 2016 at 2:18 am

    This is my story: I wasn't looking for a date, but came across the site by chance. I was on for a very short time when I got hit up. First by a guy that said he was a doctor, but sounded more like a moron. Within a week he was calling me 'Babe'. Soon after I was approached by another that was quite good at his craft. Exceptional actually, but there does seem to be pattern. I'd like to share my findings here, but how can I know that the scammers aren't here looking for tips?

    I will go so far as to write about an experience I had that left me quite baffled. Hopefully you can shed some light on it.

    You mentioned that we need to go with our gut feelings. This is a tip that is becoming more and more true in this day and age in general.

    The encounter I had was with a man with a picture of a naked chest as his profile picture. He provided no other picture. Most of our correspondence was , 'Hi', 'Hey', 'How you doing?' . . . quite general and quite boring, but I was curious.

    I started chatting with him shortly after I had encountered my first perpetrator (I'll call him 'suitor' for the sake of this question). There was no reason to believe that one had anything to do with the other, but I had this gut feeling that in some way this new guy (naked chest) was somehow connected.

    Anyway, 'Naked chest' asked for my number and I ignored the question. Later when my curiosity was heightened, I gave it to him. After more of the same tiresome dialect he suggested that he had been asking me out and wanted to know if we could meet up. I unknowingly missed that clue . . . non-the-less I took him up on his proposal.

    We were to meet at the market in his neighborhood. I arrived early and texted him to let me know when he got there, and that I was going to go into one of the other stores. He texted me when he arrived (later than expedited). I came out and waited, but there was no one to be seen. He texted that he had to take a call form his 'boss' and he was terribly sorry. The call would take longer than he intended. I told him I was going to grab a bite to eat, to just let me know when he was available. I finally gave up and told him I was heading home. He said "I'm so sorry". I asked if he saw me. He said 'no'. The next day I didn't hear anything. Again curiosity got the better of me. After a couple of days I said, 'If you'd like to try again, let me know, otherwise just tell me you're not interested and there would be no hard feelings.' I never heard from him again, tho I've seen him active on the site.

    For the sake of argument, I think it helpful to say, I look exactly as I do in my pictures, so it wasn't a matter of my appearance. My curiosity can't help but wonder if his 'boss' was my 'suitor'. But what would be the purpose, what would the purpose be either way?

    • Dann Albright
      December 28, 2016 at 7:09 pm

      That's a pretty strange scenario. Just goes to show that it's a good idea to listen to your intuition in these sorts of situations!

  48. cc Clean
    October 23, 2016 at 11:56 pm

    I've read that statistics show that one in 10 people on a dating sight is a scam. My experience , however, has been more like only one out of 10 is the real deal.

    This is my story: I wasn't looking for a date, but came across the site by chance. I was on for a very short time when I got hit up. First by a guy that said he was a doctor, but sounded more like a moron. Within a week he was calling me 'Babe'. Soon after I was approached by another that was quite good at his craft. Exceptional actually, but there does seem to be pattern. I'd like to share my findings here, but how can I know that the scammers aren't here looking for tips?

    I will go so far as to write about an experience I had that left me quite baffled. Hopefully you can shed some light on it.

    You mentioned that we need to go with our gut feelings. This is a tip that is becoming more and more true in this day and age in general.

    The encounter I had was with a man with a picture of a naked chest as his profile picture. He provided no other picture. Most of our correspondence was , 'Hi', 'Hey', 'How you doing?' . . . quite general and quite boring, but I was curious.

    I started chatting with him shortly after I had encountered my second perpetrator (I'll call him 'suitor' for the sake of this question). There was no reason to believe that one had anything to do with the other, but I had this gut feeling that in some way this new guy (naked chest) was somehow connected.

    Anyway, 'Naked chest' asked for my number and I ignored the question. Later when my curiosity was heightened, I gave it to him. After more of the same tiresome dialect he suggested that he had been asking me out and wanted to know if we could meet up. I unknowingly missed that clue . . . non-the-less I took him up on his proposal.

    We were to meet at the market in his neighborhood. I arrived early and texted him to let me know when he got there, and that I was going to go into one of the other stores. He texted me when he arrived (later than expedited). I came out and waited, but there was no one to be seen. He texted that he had to take a call form his 'boss' and he was terribly sorry. The call would take longer than he intended. I told him I was going to grab a bite to eat, to just let me know when he was available. I finally gave up and told him I was heading home. He said "I'm so sorry". I asked if he saw me. He said "no'" The next day I didn't hear anything. Again curiosity got the better of me. After a couple of days I said, 'If you'd like to try again, let me know, otherwise just tell me you're not interested and there would be no hard feelings.' I never heard from him again, tho I've seen him active on the site.

    For the sake of argument, I think it helpful to say, I look exactly as I do in my pictures, so it wasn't a matter of my appearance. My curiosity can't help but wonder if his 'boss' was my 'suitor'. But what would be the purpose, what would the purpose be either way?

    Collier Circle

    • Dann Albright
      October 26, 2016 at 9:31 pm

      That is pretty strange, you're right. Definitely seem suspicious, though. Glad to hear you're being careful!

    • Dennis Nilsson
      September 13, 2017 at 11:12 am

      "I've read that statistics show that one in 10 people on a dating sight is a scam. My experience , however, has been more like only one out of 10 is the real deal."

      That is also my experience! Only one out of 10 is the real deal.

  49. Lynn
    October 23, 2016 at 6:14 pm

    I am not sure- but I believe this guy is trying to set up trust. He has sent me about 15 pictures- including one of his daughter- nothing came up in various searches- an architect who first had to travel to Paris- who sent me pictures of he posing w the landmarks I asked( but he could have these in his arsenal just in case- I asked him to send me a picture of him lying in bed- he did-there is someone by his name listed in his town in the white pages- his daughters name when searched has this guy's name as a relative. His English reflects his education very well spoken- but is is Acraa Ghana surveying the land as an architecture before the hotel is built- dropped his phone- does not have money on him for his iphone6- I told him to buy a throw away prepaid if it was important to speak w me. He asked again- I refused- he apologized that he bothered me and continued to talk to me. His communication is sparse now saying the interconnect is bad in Ghana. I have questioned him about the weather- he is on the mark and he called me both from Paris and Acraa- both with the correct country code- I am cautious but confused

    • Dann Albright
      October 26, 2016 at 9:30 pm

      That's a tough call. There are quite a few signs that it could be a scam, but his responsiveness to your requests seems like a good sign. Either way, be very cautious, especially if he starts asking for things from you.

    • Laura
      April 20, 2018 at 5:18 am

      Scammers have access to to s of cell phoneswith carious numbers—scams!!!

  50. Jerome Martin
    October 14, 2016 at 3:21 am

    I was scammed on surge ! Cute younger guy chatted for a bit and seemed fine. Then asked me to do a hookup Id for LGBT offenders . He gave me the link to get verified and it said it was free but needed a cc to validate me. So like a dummy I used my only cc I had ( bank card ) and the sight charged me 39.99. I told him what it did and he sent me another link to clear it and get my money back, but that link asked for my cc info again. I told him this and he said I had to put it in again to get my money back and get the free trail. So I did but my card was declined , I freaked out thinking that my account was wipe clean out. So I checked my account and it was only the 39.99 taken out still . I told him this then he ask how much money my card had on it ( red flag ) I told him enough lol . I call my bank and closed my debit card and have a new one coming in 3 days. I feel I got lucky and that he was planning somehow to clean out my bank account . So I am on the look out now that's for sure. People suck!!

    • Dann Albright
      October 21, 2016 at 8:53 pm

      Sorry to hear about that! I'm glad you didn't get scammed for all you're worth. It could have been a lot worse. Thanks for sharing your experience—hopefully it helps someone else avoid the same fate!

  51. Sad
    August 29, 2016 at 8:17 pm

    It's funny, (not really) but you believe you are getting conned and yet you can't believe that it can actually happen to you. I met a fellow on a dating site - made a good connection, gave him my phone number, he wanted to send me something so I gave him my home address and I got flowers and chocolates. I was on cloud nine. He didn't want to meet until we talked and knew we had a connection. Made sense, I had never been on a dating site before. After a very short time he called be sweetheart in his emails/texts and I liked his compliments. He is an engineer and was submitting different bids. Had one accepted in Turkey - and would be flying out the following week to set up the initial contacts and set up the working plan. He is there for less than a week, and a project that was happening in the US was having problems can I send him $11,000. to cover off. I don't have that kind of money, but I had saved $4000.00 that I could lend him till he gets back. Next week for sure. Talk to him by phone and the project in Turkey has problems and he now must pay for repairs to a machine that one of his employees broke. Needs more money. I don't have any. Every time he phones, texts, he asks if I have come up with any solution because we are in this together. He calls and says he can come home, the Director of the project will allow him to leave so he can get his financial situation straightened out in the US. But he doesn't have the funds to purchase the ticket, could I give him the money? I do. He gets to the airport and can't get on the flight, the machinery company will not allow him to board the plane. He gets a lawyer and the lawyer discusses with machinery company, if he now buys the machinery they will allow him out of the country. He need $30,000.00 to buy the machinery and when the project is done, he can sell it and recoup some of the funds. I am suppose to go to the bank for a loan in order for this to proceed. He has no one else that can help him, so he says. I read this and I think, oh come on, are you that blind, so in love with a fictional character on the computer. Yet, I think, he is this great person, that I might be missing out on. Then what....I feel like a fool, in my gut I think I am getting screwed, and in my heart I want this person.

    • Dann Albright
      October 21, 2016 at 8:55 pm

      So sorry to hear about your experience . . . that's really rough. You're right, though; even if you're on the lookout for scams, you can still be taken advantage of. They're really good at what they do.

    • Anonymous
      December 18, 2016 at 7:12 am

      That's exactly how I feel

    • Laura
      March 18, 2017 at 10:05 pm

      I just had a go round with this SAME guy. I reported him to as a scammer.
      I didn't give in when he asked that I wire money to Turkey and called him out but he continued to try to keep me on the hook. Same story, his credit card not working in Turkey and he needs $$ for machines and materials and as soon as that's settled he'll be coming home to spend a week with me.
      He told me he was an architect/specialist contractor and yes got a job in Turkey that he had to leave town immediately for. Had a supposed Turkish cell and whatsapp acct.
      I demanded he send me verified ID and he kept coming up with reasons why he could not--company in Turkey keeps their passports until the job is done, he left his driver's license at home. He finally sent me a fake CA driver's license with a bunch of mistakes on it and when I called him out on that he finally stopped trying to keep me on the hook. He popped up on under a new profile and I reported him again.

      • Dann Albright
        March 29, 2017 at 5:58 pm

        While I'm not totally convinced it's the same guy, it certainly bears a remarkable resemblance! I'm glad you figured it out in time.

    • Dennis Nilsson
      September 13, 2017 at 1:36 pm

      Your story have a remarkable resemblance with this story," Thousands Of Lonely Women Are Duped Each Year", published in the Australian "Womens Weekly Nov. 2016"

      A pdf of the story is a available here

  52. Debbie
    August 12, 2016 at 3:28 am

    I got on our looking for somebody and I found a guy who live in New York who is going to work in Egypt and this one on for for five months and I believe that's where he was and he was coming to Florida to meet me and I sent him money and actually I gave him I gave him my bank account number And he put money in it and the bank said it wasn't real so now I have a case on it from the police and the fraud department so I'm scared to see what happens to me I believed everything he said, I sent a iPhone over for his birthday and a PlayStation 4 for his daughter I was so stupid I have been so sick over this mess I just hope I do not get in trouble .

    • Dann Albright
      August 16, 2016 at 2:18 pm

      I wouldn't worry about getting in trouble; people get scammed all the time, and I don't think that's much of an issue. Also, don't be too hard on yourself; the people who do this are experts, and they know exactly which emotional triggers to use. They're really good at what they do, and you're not the first or last person to be taken advantage of.

  53. Lottalibella
    August 2, 2016 at 7:22 pm

    About two weeks ago, I (f, 33) met a guy on the "Whisper" app. He said his name was Jim, he was 31 years old and lived in Texas. I live in Germany and I am German.
    He seemed very nice and we connected really well right from the beginning. I texted with him for about five days in a row for several hours every night and enjoyed it very much. He told me that he was a computer network architect who worked from home. When I said that I think that he must be very intelligent because I could never do a job like his, he told me that I was so full of compliments that night. When I replied that I didn't want to come across as slimy, he told me: "You dont. You just seem like a girl who might be falling for a guy." Even though this wasn't the case for me (I cannot fall for someone who I haven't met in person), in order to tease him a little bit, I replied: "Maybe... for a guy like you...".
    To this he answered: "I'm hoping. Because I'm really falling for you!" Now in hindsight it really seems odd that someone would write something like this after having texted for only a few days. But then I somehow really believed him...
    One evening when we were in the middle of texting again, he wrote all of a sudden: "I have bad news. My mom just called. She thinks my Dad is having a heart attack. She dialed 911. I have to go over there immediately." He promised me that he would write me the following day (Friday), which he actually did. He told me that his Dad had actually had a heart attack and was now in hospital in intensive care and that a bypass surgery was planned for the following day (Saturday). The next time I heard from him was Sunday night. He texted me: "I don't know how to say this. My Dad didn't make it. He didn't even make it to the surgery but passed late Friday night." He also wrote that he was very busy and that it would take him a day or two until he could be on "Whisper" again. I completely believed what he told me and I didn't expect him to text me until a few days later. To my surprise, he already texted the following night again, saying that he was having a few minutes alone and that he would be glad if we could talk for a little while. He told me a little bit about the funeral arrangements and other things he and his family were occupied with at the moment. He was very sweet in what he wrote (he said it was so nice talking to me and that I was so sweet etc.) but also seemed really drained and devastated. Of course, I believed the things he told me and tried to comfort him. At some piont he said that he should leave before long but didn't want to, so we continued texting further. After about another five minutes he wrote: "I better go. I wish I could talk all night, but family calls." I responded how much I had enjoyed talking to him that night and that I wished I could be there with him in this difficult time to comfort him.
    But he never responded again! He jhas completely disappeared since then. No "Good night" or "Talk to you soon" or anything like that on this night and not a single sign from him since then.
    I already had a strange feeling that night when I didn't get a real goodbye from him, since he always used to wish me a good night before leaving. Then again, I thought that he was probabaly too devastated to pay attention to such things in this difficult time. I texted him the following night and asked if he was ok. (Of course I didn't expect long text messages from him at that point. I just wanted to know how he was doing.) No response! Then, for the following days I texted him again that I was missing him and that I was worried about him and just wanted to know if he was okay. Again no response (but also no blocking on his part.) He has just remained completely silent since he wrote me: "I better go..." this one night. Today marks the 8th day since I last heard from him and after having sent him another message last night, I have now decided not to write him again and have also deleted our conversation. By doing this I am not able to contact him any longer the only way of getting in contact again would be if he texted me. But I don't think this will happen...

    Dear Mr. Albright,

    I would love to get your opinion on this story. Do you think I have fallen victim to a romantic scam here? Considering the fact that he told me he was falling for me, only not to respond to my messages at all shortly after, but ignoring me completely instead. Or do you think that it might really be the case that the death of a close family member has such an impact on someone that he actually might not be able to communicate by writing just one short sentence in order to let the person he was allegedly falling for know how he is doing?

    Thank you so much for reading this story! I would really appreciate an answer from you.

    Best regards from Germany

    • Dann Albright
      August 11, 2016 at 3:01 pm

      That's strange . . . because he didn't ask you for money or anything, it seems unlikely to be a scam, but the behavior sounds a lot like the typical stories you hear, so it's possible that it was an aborted attempt to ask you for money. It's really hard to tell, especially when contact was just broken off. I wish I had better advice for you!

  54. Anonymous
    July 9, 2016 at 8:46 am

    Part Two: How can a person who has never interact with you tell you they love you. Only a month later. Never give anyone money or buy gifts for someone you don't know. If the person can only talk to you for 10 to 15 minutes on the phone everyday. Red Flag. You must interact and be a part of that persons life to build a true relationship. Don't ignore Red Flags! Those red flags are their to protect you. Plus remember you are not desperate, take your time do a background check and who gives a damn if the person is insulted because you have chosen to check what's behind the door. Your first Love should be you looking out for yourself.

  55. Anonymous
    July 9, 2016 at 8:37 am

    I met man from Brisbane Australia. Named Wayne Harrison who claims he works for Qantas Airline. If this man contacts you via any dating site. Women Run and I mean run real fast. He is only interested in having an affair. He is a true Sociopath! Everything he says is a lie all lies all the time. First warning sign which I ignored was when he sent me a Birthday card. But on the card he put my Address and not his. I completely ignored what was truly a Red Flag. Then I was invited to come and visit Brisbane but only when his wife left on a vacation was I invited. He stated by the way he was in the process of divorcing. I ignored this Red Flag also. If a person is not Divorce and cannot produce legal Divorce papers that you can hold in your hand and check online they filed then run. Second Red Flag. Another major Red Flag was him telling me a month later that he loved me

    • Dann Albright
      July 13, 2016 at 5:45 pm

      That doesn't sound like a scam, but sorry you went through that experience!

  56. Anonymous
    July 7, 2016 at 7:13 pm

    I hope someone can help me, I met someone on a gay dating site, he was the same age as me, and sent me pictures, and I thought wow, someone this handsome really is writing to me, he didn't say he was young or overseas, and said that he lives in New York, and he was an engineer and Architect and would send me pictures of construction sites that he was working at, and said that he had a firm in New York, and he didn't ask for my e-mail address until later when we got to know each other. then we exchanged number but will only use Viber as he says that he likes this service, no questions asked and I didn't mind as we were just talking, so the following week after we exchanged numbers and email address he was going to Rome to visit his mom and girls, he said that he was divorced and because he was gay, but anyways, he went to Rome for Easter and will be back in two weeks, well a week later was going to be my birthday, and he asked for my address and I did ask for his as well, and he did give me a New York Address, so again, I didn't question it, but on my birthday, he sent me roses, and I was very happy and then he send me a picture of him holding a sign saying happy birthday, I was so happy and I thought I found my dream guy, but when he was suppose to go home his mom fell down the stairs and broke her knee, so he had to prepare for her care, but then he had to go to Berlin for a meeting which they accepted him as the designer of their building and he had to go to Ghana and has been there since, we have been corresponding for several months and he keeps me informed on the progress of the building, and was suppose to be here this week, but delay in building, but now he says he ran out of funds and cannot finish the roof, he says that he had to use all of his money and several of his people have helped and asked if I can fund him 50000 dollars to help, but I said that I don't have that type of money and asked if I can get a loan and he will pay it back when he gets here, but what is bothering me know Is that he isn't being loving as he was for the past few months and he said that its because he doesn't know what is going to happen to the building, so I was thinking about him and did a google search and his pictures that he has sent me is of the famous photographer in New York, and I am confused as he didn't seem like a scammer, but the guy I have been writing to is Godfred Hesse and does anyone know if this guy is real, I know his pictures aren't but I am having such a hard time believing that he is lying to me, I can't afford the 50000 but he doesn't stop writing and he isn't begging, he is upset that he can't get this project done. Maybe I am being stupid or guidable, I don't know, and I am not that ugly looking, so I am confused, please help.

    • Dann Albright
      July 13, 2016 at 5:45 pm

      Asking you for $50,000? That definitely sounds like a con. I just can't imagine that being real. I'd recommend breaking off contact immediately. I know it's hard, but the risks are awfully high. Scammers are good at what they do, and they rarely "seem like" scammers. Sorry you're going through this!

      • younes
        June 16, 2019 at 11:56 am

        Hello, I hope you are fine. I need help from you if someone refuses to talk to you through camera What do you do?

  57. Owen
    May 3, 2016 at 6:32 pm

    Hi I met a gay man on gay Cupid he asked me for my e mail address which I have him he wanted to come over and visit me but said he only had 100 dollars so I said i would not send him his air flight personally but I would go through a travel agency which he recommended so I sent 576$ to the travel agents bank using swift bank numbers the travel agency sent me his reservation number and confirmed it then there was another problem he needed travel money so me not thinking I sent another 400$ on the day he was about to fly he said he was in a bad car accident and sent me letter to confirm it which he said his mother scanned for him also phot of him in hospital he said he will change air ticket flight when he gets better I don't know if i have been scammed or not

    • Morgan
      May 23, 2016 at 11:57 pm

      Sorry for all this situation you are going thru. But 100% sure that person is a con artist , and found you and easy target.
      I just received a communication from an wonderful-good looking gay guy from Russia asking me for money, I met him thru a gay site.
      Is been three weeks only , not enough time for this ,a friend of mine has a similar story , therefore I do have all the warnings . Needless to say , I didn't believe , so I went thru all the information on the web about gay-scam-fraud ,so after that I decided to call the FBI and report this crook :
      I hope my story will help.

    • Dann Albright
      July 13, 2016 at 5:43 pm

      Yeah, that's almost certainly a scam. I'd cease contact with this person and report him to Cupid!

  58. Leslie
    April 26, 2016 at 4:52 pm

    I ventured into the dating scene via Plenty of Fish after my divorce last year, and connected online with a very charming, pleasant-looking man who "lived" in Vancouver. His stated career was a civil engineer, he was widowed, & raising a young son on his own. He phoned me often (his number was listed as from the Vancouver area) and we spent a lot of time on Yahoo Messenger chatting daily. (I now know that moving women quickly off the dating site to a messenger site can be a red flag).
    As Dan Albright's article stated, this man was not able to meet because he had business in South Africa for several weeks. He called me daily with the South African number, keeping very close contact. I was very mixed in my thoughts. I wanted to believe that this was a burgeoning relationship, but I was also very anxious. And yes, he asked me for emergency money and against my better judgment, I sent him some. And then he asked for more a few days later; another work-related problem. I asked him questions about these issues and he always had a semi-viable excuse. But it became too much and I said I cannot do this anymore. The final straw was his request to send a large sum of money via my bank account. He sent me a "document" from his lawyer in the UK to verify that all was above board and I took it to my friend who is a lawyer. She said it was completely fraudulent (law firm's address in London was a pub), multiple spelling mistakes, false signatures, etc.). So with that and other inconsistencies I discovered like his picture on another dating site in Ontario, I confronted him about his scheme and blocked him.
    It was a difficult lesson, particularly since I was already feeling a bit vulnerable with starting to date again. I am still confounded by this man's incredible skill at bamboozling me (who is not normally gullible), and developing the illusion of a warm, caring, supportive bond.
    I reported him to the Anti-Fraud website in Canada, the local RCMP, Plenty of Fish dating site, and the other dating site in Ontario. I do not believe anything was investigated. POF had his profile still up weeks later, so no doubt he has more poor fish on his hook!

    • Dann Albright
      May 3, 2016 at 1:28 pm

      Sorry to hear about your difficulties with this! It all seems to obvious in hindsight, but I'm sure it can be very convincing in the moment. It's certainly not a rare occurrence, so it's clear that it happens to a lot of people. Thanks for sharing your story! I hope you get back to online dating soon and find some success. :-)

  59. Anonymous
    November 8, 2015 at 4:59 pm

    Hi Dann

    This is very good article to translate in another language, can you approve?

  60. Anonymous
    November 7, 2015 at 2:36 pm

    I encountered one of these scammers a year ago on a dating site. Long story short:

    She had photos that seemed way too professional. In her conversation she mentioned she had changed her hairstyle and that her phone camera was broken. Her webcam was also conveniently broken and she asked me to turn mine on.

    I TIN-EYE Searched the photos and found she was using an adult model's photos. After researching the adult model, I found that person's twitter feed and PMed her. She said "Oh, yes. You are SO BEING CATFISHED!"

    I reported this scammer's facebook profile with all the gathered evidence, reported her dating profile, and her iP ADDRESS is currently banned from facebook and the dating site.

  61. Anonymous
    November 6, 2015 at 11:17 pm

    I seem to actually be a "target" of these kind of scammers, the first time someone tried this trick with me was with an image of us marine general James Mattis in full uniform that showed his stars and the scammer claimed he was a colonel in the us army....

    Hallo, what about being prepared do research and know the different uniforms and rank distinctions??? Anyway, even in Norway people know who General Mattis is since his comments of "fun to shoot some people and afghans don't have any manhood left anyway".

    I played along for a while, that was fun, but then blow his scam by asking if he thought his mum enjoyed anal sex and he deleted his facebook profile for just to return to me, now with an image of us army general David Petreus.

    • Dann Albright
      November 7, 2015 at 6:16 pm

      You know, I'm surprised that people choose such high-profile pictures to use for these scams. Even if they're trying to go for the military thing, you'd think they'd just find a no-name solider and use that. Mattis and Petraeus are recognizable around the world, and not just to Americans. Obviously not everyone is very advanced in their scheming. :-)

      • Anonymous
        November 7, 2015 at 6:29 pm

        They are lazy because too often they do not have to do any work to get to peoples money, too many people want to believe them, so they just take the first high resolution images of american officers they can find in a google search, come up with a story about being a widow with a son in a school in London and go for them.

        (I wonder if Mattis and Pretraeus know their images being used in scams, but that is a different discussion).

        • Dann Albright
          November 10, 2015 at 4:23 am

          Yeah, I wonder that too. It seems like something they'd probably know about if it's happening on a regular basis, but they also have a lot of other things to worry about. :-)