Linux is the operating system of choice for those who decide to go their own way. The open source model means the building blocks are there for you if you decide that you need your very own operating system.
This has resulted in more Linux distros than you could ever imagine. There are tiny distros like Puppy, chunky distros like Debian and some altogether more sinister efforts, which is what we’ve got here.
I’ll be saving the very worst for last, so prepare yourselves…
The distro of choice for satanists the world over, Ubuntu Satanic Edition is proof that there’s an Ubuntu distro for everyone. Based on Ubuntu 10.10, the team behind Ubuntu SE really don’t seem to like Unity. In fact, they consider Ubuntu 10.10’s rustic GNOME 2 desktop environment to be “the pinnacle of Ubuntu development” though the developers appear to be closer to dark theme fetishists than true devil worshipers.
If you’d like to try out Satan’s own OS then you’ll have to download a live CD, which the team have predictably dubbed the “undead CD”, though I can’t really see why you’d be doing that. Aside from a tasty dose of eye-strain from the red-on-black-on-blood skinning choices, Ubuntu SE is more a novelty choice than a serious OS. Sure, there is more heavy metal and pentagram wallpapers than your average open source project, but the software (Firefox, Gedit and so on) remains largely the same.
Ubuntu Satanic Edition has received numerous complaints and messages of discouragement. A quick glance at the news section reveals that Ubuntu SE 666.10 “Necrophiliac Neuromancer” doesn’t go down too well in the web’s Christian circles.
While most people won’t find Hannah Montana Linux anywhere near as “offensive” as the previous distro, it’s still probably not going to be your OS of choice unless you watch way too much Disney channel. To cut the project some slack, the author has admitted: “I thought – what would attract young users to Linux? So I created this idea after a lot of reading and work.”
So it’s designed to attract young children to Linux, a task many of us would dread I’m sure. The distro itself is little more than a re-skinned Kubuntu, and boy what a skin! The standard KDE menu has become the Hannah Montana Menu, the background is a sickly pink and according to one reviewer the lack of GIMP, LibreOffice or KOffice is a bit of an oversight for an educational distro.
Ok, so it’s not particularly disturbing or offensive but there’s no denying it’s a strange project to pour all that time into.
The first of the politically charged distributions on this list, Red Star OS is the Linux distribution of choice in North Korea. The project began in 2002 in a bid to replace the country’s dependence on Microsoft Windows, which was the primary OS of choice in the country up until then.
The OS only comes in Korean and features a modified version of Mozilla Firefox called Naenara. This web browser connects to the country’s intranet known as Kwangmyong, a walled-garden approach which has no bridge to the standard Internet we know and love.
Red Star OS uses KDE 3 and is currently in its second version. It can be found in universities, libraries and other institutions across the country, though private computer ownership is not common in North Korea.
And the award for the worst Linux distribution ever to grace the Internet goes to Apartheid Linux, a distribution that’s as offensive and disgusting as it is pointless. As you can see from the slightly modified banner above, this is a racially-charged Linux distro for ignorant white people.
I really am struggling to see why a group of self-professed “white nationalist” require their own operating system, but a look at the release notes reveals the distro is based on PCLinuxOS, comes with Tor installed (I wonder why) and mostly comprises of swastika wallpapers and other such offensive material.
I’m not going to be linking to the website responsible as I’d loathe to provide them with traffic or downloads. Of all the flavors of Linux on the web, this has to be the strangest and most disturbing I’ve ever seen.
I’ve used Linux extensively in the past, and I must say those days are behind me. However, if I was going to use it again I’d probably not choose any of the above. While Hannah Montana Linux, Ubuntu Satanic Edition and Red Star OS are more obscure than they are disturbing, there’s no denying that Apartheid Linux is just plain wrong.
Do you know of any similar obscure distros? Have you heard of any of the above? Maybe you’ve used one? Add your thoughts, shock and disgust to the comments below.
Image Credit: Evil Tux (jigo)