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When I was originally working on this article, I thought to myself, “Why don’t I go take a photo of a ninja for the readers at home?” Fortunately, I did, and that photo is to your right, but unfortunately, it would seem that you simply can’t take a photo of a ninja. They are practically invisible to photos, so I guess they are like vampires – but more violent.
But anyway, I heard somewhere that the Internet can teach you how to do everything. So whilst sitting in my apartment the other day, I thought to myself, “Man. I wish I was a ninja“, and lo and behold, I discovered that the Internet could teach me everything about it that I needed to know!
Now when I say “ninja”, you should know that I’m not talking about those so-called “real” ninjas that some of you may know about. Yes, they actually dress for the occasion (which means no black suit), fight to the death, and don’t have any fancy ninja gear that the movie production companies like to market as children’s toys. No, no… none of that. I don’t need any links to Wikipedia in the comments.
What we’re going to be talking about today are most certainly the stereotypical, black-suited, star-throwing, red-belt-wearing Internet ninjas that occasionally like to fight pirates and show up at parades in which the Onion tends to have trouble covering each and every year. However, a little website called Enter The Ninja is a good place to start compiling your Internet ninja knowledge in that it seems to devote itself entirely to the topic.
Enter The Ninja presents itself as mostly a humor site (look at the hate mail), but it actually has a great deal of awesome ninja facts and history that can help you gain better knowledge of the subject. Beyond that, there is even specific information such as the weapons, the poisons, and tools that they used. I’m going to be honest with you – this site is legit.
As an endnote, Enter the Ninja prides itself as being one of the top websites on the blog of “The Office” character Dwight Schrute (US). Other than that, there are lot of games and other fun stuff you can find on this website.
Part of this ninja nonsense is the fact that you are going to need to think like a ninja. How does one think like a ninja? Well folks, the only way to think like a ninja is to ask what a ninja thinks. Lucky for you, there’s the online show, Ask A Ninja.
When you think “Ask A Ninja”, I believe the best description for it would be “blood-spurred, casual vlogging”, or something like that. I’m not entirely sure what to think of it, myself. Basically, Ask A Ninja is one of the older vlogging series that exists on the web, and it is based entirely on a ninja’s opinion on everyday (or not-so-everyday) life.
The premise is simple – people ask the Ninja questions, and the Ninja answers the questions. These inquiries can be entirely bizarre or totally reasonable, but with that being said, the Ninja’s responses are always going to be entertaining. Do yourself a favor and watch them all (especially the omnibus episodes).
On the reals, you may want to know how to do all that funky jumping and running up walls kind of junk that ninjas (and Chuck Norris) know how to do. I feel you, and that’s why I’ve included the incredible Parkour.com on this list. However, for the record, I do not participate in parkour, and the chances are that I’m never going to – Lockhart don’t play that.
However, if you want some tips on improving your parkour participation as well as finding people to train with, Parkour.com is where it’s at. Furthermore, there are quite a few videos available on the site as well as some educational information on the art of parkour. In this case, we’re going to call this “ninja parkour”. The only difference is that you get to throw ninja stars as you run along your neighbor’s fence.
So out of all these sites, Parkour.com is probably the most legitimate one that you can make use of. It’s got a pretty nice community that’s all about a great physical activity that is actually fun and exciting. Give it a run, and you definitely won’t be disappointed.
I bet you didn’t know I was just behind you, watching you read this article the entire time. Did you just turn around? Guess what – that was the sound of me leaving. What kind of sound is that? Silence. This is how much of a ninja these sites have made me, and they could definitely do the same for you.
However, if none of these websites help you, you could always trust this guy:
What other sites do you use for your ninja-ing? Did you find any cool tips on the sites shown here?