Going on a date can be a nerve-wracking experience. Here is someone you’re obviously interested in romantically, and the pressure is on to impress them enough to at least secure a second date. It’s surprisingly easy to crumble under such intense scrutiny.
It really doesn’t take much to ruin a date either. A social faux pas here, or a misreading of the signals there, and your potential partner will likely sneak out the nearest exit as soon as your back is turned. It potentially takes just five words to ruin a date…
The #5WordsToRuinADate Hashtag
We know this thanks to Twitter, which has ably demonstrated how few words it takes to ruin a date. Using the hashtag #5WordsToRuinADate, Twitter users suggested many examples of short sentences which can instantly turn a potentially magical date into an absolute nightmare.
There were some noticeable trends weaving their way through the #5WordsToRuinADate, all of which offer some legitimate advice on what not to say during a date. Pushing your likes and dislikes on others is out, as is stifling someone’s right to hold an opinion. Mentioning past relationships is a big no-no, as is assuming a sexual dalliance is on the cards.
In essence, be yourself, be polite, and be nice, and you’ll navigate the world of dating without embarrassing yourself. But enough of the sensible advice, it’s time to see the best and worst examples of this fun hashtag that recently dominated Twitter.
“They’re real? Can I touch?” #FiveWordsToRuinADate
— D (ShutterMakhi) (@MumbaiKiChokri) January 14, 2015
This is never a particularly appropriate question, but it’s almost certainly not going to go down well on a first, second, or even third date.
“Don’t you just love Bieber?” #5wordstoruinadate
— Kevin Widmer (@KevWidmer) January 16, 2015
The correct response to this question/statement about Justin Bieber is, “No, not personally, but it’s perfectly fine if you love the annoying pop twerp rightly considered to be the worst thing Canada has ever inflicted on the world.” Probably.
#5WordsToRuinADate Does this smell like chloroform?
— Cody (@Cody_Maggard) January 16, 2015
Don’t sniff the handkerchief that has just been placed under your nose. Close your nostrils tightly and make your way to the nearest exit. Fast.
Your place or my truck? #5wordstoruinadate
— Callme Lalit (@LalitSChowdhary) January 15, 2015
This is disagreeable on so many levels. He owns a truck, he thinks sex is guaranteed, and he thinks you’d be happy to spend the night in his cold, smelly vehicle. No, no, and thrice no.
I don’t like to shower #5wordstoruinadate
— James (@boxxers06) January 15, 2015
Unless this is followed up with, “But I have a long soak in the bath every single day,” make your excuses and leave.
“I’m already wearing a condom” #5wordstoruinadate
— Dean Burnett (@garwboy) January 14, 2015
While it’s good to be prepared for any eventuality, putting a condom on before going on a date may just be taking things a little too far.
When are we getting married? #FiveWordsToRuinADate
— kim cormack (@kimcormack) January 15, 2015
When? Already? How about we eat some dinner, watch a film, and then talk about IF rather than WHEN we want to get married.
“I’m a huge Nickelback fan” #FiveWordsToRuinADate
— Gareth Wild (@GarethWild) January 13, 2015
Each to their own and all that, but you would have to be the most tolerant person in the world to put up with Nickelback being blasted out loud day and night for years to come.
Should have lowered my expectations #5WordsToRuinADate
— Shelby (@LtdEdShelby) January 17, 2015
Think it, don’t say it. You cruel, heartless person, you.
These rug burns will heal! #5wordstoruinadate
— Hank Marducus (@marducus_hank) January 16, 2015
If this is on the date itself then the rug burns must have been obtained the night before. Which suggests, well, I don’t want to cast aspersions.
#5WordsToRuinADate do you have a sister?
— Cj Diduck (@cj_diduck7) January 17, 2015
I do, but she has even less tolerance for creeps than me.
#5wordstoruinadate how do we do sex?
— Official Rufus (@RufusOnTheRun) January 16, 2015
WE don’t do sex. But there are plenty of videos online which will help you learn the basics.
#5wordstoruinadate I don’t have herpes anymore.
— § (@Pvdero) January 16, 2015
Honesty IS the best policy, but this is one occasion on which keeping your mouth shut may have been a better option.
Usually I date beautiful women. #FiveWordsToRuinADate
— Sadanand Dhume (@dhume) January 14, 2015
It’s quite a skill to deliver such a cutting message in so few words. It’s an even greater skill to come up with a suitable riposte on the fly. No, I’m out.
I still use Internet Explorer #FiveWordsToRuinADate
— Salim Kassam (@msalimkassam) January 13, 2015
That’s it, the date has ended. In fact, I’d be out the door even before “Explorer” had left my date’s mouth.
What 5 Words Would Ruin Your Date?
You’ve seen the best suggestions Twitter had to offer to this hashtag, but now it’s your turn to deliver the goods.
Tell us in the comments section below either what five words would ruin a date for you or what five words you imagine would ruin a date for your partner were they to fall (dis)gracefully from your lips.
There is no right and wrong answers, and you’re only limited by your creativity. So what are you waiting for?!
Image Credit: Aarni Heiskanen via Flickr