My boyfriend went to use his computer and out of curiosity he went to the eharmony website, as a joke he put my name down and would you believe it came up with my details. Email address name etc but no photo. I knew this existed as my ex husband put me up on this site as a joke to say I am unable to find a partner I need to find one online..
Thats ok, as I treated it as so anyways. My point is that my now boyfriend thinks I used his lap top to go into this eHarmony website and look for single men. I didnt, and as many times as I said this to him he doesnt believe me. Is there a way of finding out if I did log in and go into the pages of eHarmony from his laptop.
He thinks I now used his laptop to access his bank accounts and details. I didnt and I hate injustice. He is now an EX as he has broken up with me over this.
I beg you if there is a way to find out please advise me or tell me so I can pass the information on to him.
Thanking you in advance
System: Mac OS X Version 10.5.8
Tagged: account activity, browser history, login, privacy
7 Answers -
Bruce Epper
June 14, 2012You MIGHT be able to get records of “your” logins to eHarmony and the associated IP address (if it is kept) from the folks at eHarmony. Based on the date/time of the accesses, you may be able to prove to him that it wasn’t you if you were together at the time or could not have had access to the laptop. If it was all done very recently (generally within the last 14 days), it would show up in the browser history if the history is not cleared regularly.
The IP address may be useful if you can prove that it is one that is outside the range controlled by his ISP (could not be assigned to his laptop).
As far as his bank accounts, if he uses his laptop for banking using the history again may show him that the only accesses were made by him based on the dates they occurred but there is not a way to show who was actually at the keyboard (unless he has monitoring software running that takes pictures of the user with the webcam).
muotechguy
June 14, 2012Honestly though, why bother? If he didn’t trust you and was a suspicious nutjob, then forget him. You can do better.
You could prove it as Bruce suggest with IP logins and such, but to what end? So you can get back together, only to be faced with more accusations every time a male rings you phone, or you go somewhere without telling him?
MUOtechguy is giving you the best advice – without trust, there are only lots of problems and conflicts ahead…even if there’s good stuff going on too. I guess it depends how much you like the drama in your relationship. I’d rather put that energy into other areas of my life : )
June 14, 2012I hate agreeing with you publicly, James, but you’re right. It sounds like this problem is deeper than the merely technical.
June 14, 2012James is now an agony uncle as well as tech guru… he’s right though. Without trust a relationship is never going to work.
June 15, 2012I briefly thought about mentioning that but didn’t based on past experience. The female of the species seems to like putting themselves into relationships that will obviously lead to abuse no matter what arguments are presented. I have since given up on trying to help in those matters.
June 19, 2012Vipul Jain
June 14, 2012show him your browser history (if you dont clean it out everyday)
if he still doesnt believe you and thinks you have deleted those certain visits to eharmony, then as moutechguy says, you can do better..
Mihovil Pletikos
June 14, 2012first, he is acting like a jerk. why did he go to eharmony?
do you have a password for your account?
Kannon Y
June 14, 2012This is one of the worst things I’ve heard of someone doing to an ex, aside from stalking and other violent behaviors. I’m truly sorry for the difficulties you’ve experienced. The other commentators have a great point: This is a strong indicator that your current ex boyfriend was up to no good.
I’m curious – don’t you have to create an account in order to search eHarmony? To emphasize this point: he actually went through the process of creating an online dating profile “out of curiosity” in order to check up on you? Could it be that he was intending to use the site for his own purposes?
There’s something called projection – generally speaking, cheaters tend to project their own needs and desires onto others. Ergo, cheaters imagine that their own partners are cheating. It’s also an indicator of narcissism.
Shadow
June 19, 2012If you contact support at eharmony they should be able to tell you if that laptop has ever logged into your account or not. I am not 100% sure but their servers should record all activity and from which IP addresses your account was accessed from. If they don’t have you ever logging in then you can show him, or if the IP address they have in their records doesn’t match your boyfriend’s laptop IP address then you didn’t log in on his laptop. They will probably ask you for his laptop’s IP address to check against their records since they aren’t allowed to give any IP’s out.
McEvechkin
July 16, 2012Is this a site to help with technical issues or is this a dear Abby column? She asked for help with the browsing history. She didn’t ask you dicks for relationship advice.
Counter question: Are you human with common sense? Well, if you are, then I’m sure you can follow my way of thinking…
Sometimes, you have to think outside the box to really solve an issue. This usually just takes common sense and creativity, but sometimes empathy will help, too.
This question screamed for a reality check. Do you really want to get technical advice on how to prove your jealous partner that you did not cheat on him? Or might it be more productive to re-evaluate and work on the relationship? Deeper issues require deeper thought, rather than superficial and temporary fixes.
July 17, 2012